Stalemate
As expected, things didn't budge an inch. At all. No matter how long time flows.
A Secondary School class gathering after 3 years, I met up with loads of old classmates that I haven't seen for ages. There was NO change in their looks, maturity level or social interaction. There were some who are spotted with new hairdos, like me but other than that, everyone's personality changed the same.
Clicks still remain and nothing much has change. Let me review the history together with you. I was relatively a loner in my class. Being placed in a class where most of them interacted more on Chinese, i was practically hanging by the social ladder. School wasn't a popularity contest back then but if you had the charisma, you could have bunch of friends and clicks just band together and scrutinise the other loners.
I was never in good terms with the guys with my class. They eat, live, smell and stank of soccer. I liked watching soccer but not to the extent of playing it every week. I'm no sporty lad but just an average joe trying to make an impact in this big globe.
On the other hand, i pride myself as being the only guy that makes an effort to interact with the gals at my class. I'm not a flirt and i don't have any ill intentions but I feel that i relate and interact better with the feminine side of my class. It is their maturity level it seems that keeps me still breathing while the rest are forcing me to drown in the depths of immaturity and popularity stakes.
Well, things never do change as I hoped. Somehow, i feel that the guys are against me for some reason or another. They are on the brink of total acquaintance only and never made an effort with me to gather more about our friendship. I remember a time where we could crap the whole day long, but it seems time has changed the tide and the wave is long forgotten.
It's interesting to see how life evolve and I wish all me classmates a good endeavour to succeed in their life. I, on the other hand, will not dwell at the past and look forward to all my new friends.
Life is indeed wonderful.
- Benjamin
Sunday, November 30, 2003
Friday, November 28, 2003
Photogenic
I'm not handsome or cute. Period.
People who knows how I look like all know that I'm just a pretty average looking boy with weird facial features that is disproportionate. I have untrimmed thick eyebrows, snotty nose, crooked teeth, normal eyes, messed-up hair, thick lips and weak chin. All in all, I just don't look like a future movie star, just someone who works in a shitty 9 to 5 job waiting for retrenchment and struggling for office ventilated air. Somehow, something on the contrary happened to me.
I was at a photoshoot, kind of being selected by my dear editor to be one of the faces featured in NextStop, a publication that features all SP diplomas that is distributed to all Secondary school 'O' level prospective students looking out for their next step into the future. First of all, I don't smile nice at all. My smile simply sucks. 70% of all my photos contain me and my goofy smile with my protruding front teeth. I look like i just escapted from a retarded institution. So how can i even look good with my barely attractive facial features and my goofy appearance?
Well, it seems my personality speaks louder than looks. There were 4 guys & 4 gals. I was chosen to be the first batch of 2 guys and 2 gals. I just posed in front of the camera, just being comfortable with the whole thing but the other 3 were somehow edgy and uncomfortable and took quite a few encouraging words from the cameraman to get them warmed up to flash a natural smile. The art director and the cameraman liked me. Strangely enough, it was because I just got into my role by jumping into the sea and started paddling then drowning, I just posed naturally and smiled decently, but me, I just didn't care how goofy I looked anyway.
Somehow or another, since I was a tall fella, they asked me to move to the front and wow, I became a centrepiece. Amazingly enough, I was a natural model for them. Just without the built or looks but the instinct to know when to smile, glare, pose and tease the lenses. The art director and the cameraman just kept asking the rest to adjust and while i just did my "thang" and pose, act cute and basically look like a kooky prick.
Well my group was finished and the second group was having their turn and guess what? The art director asked me to join the second group !!! Wow, am i that good ? or was it because they needed a geeky looking guy in the photos ? It seems that both of them commented that I was the personficiation of a "poly student". Hmmm .... I take that as a compliment somehow.
I know I have been praising myself above but all of it are true facts, not a dream! I was at Raffles Place, MediaCorp's Today press studio on the 28th floor. Well, besides that boost of confidence I met loads of great-looking individuals. I can safely say the guys were model mannequin material and the gals were gushing gorgeous gigglers. There was this girl I was kinda attracted to. I forgot her name but she kept giggling at my lame jokes.
I made an effort to kept the atmosphere as light as possible by throwing in lame comments and jokes and the gal, a 3rd year CLS student, well was quite endearing. I like her personality and was really interested in knowing her more. Anyways, I know I have no hope since attractive gals are most often hooked up to some ugly boyfriend who beat me to it. (Look at my archive or my theory of pretty gal/ugly boyfriend theory). If you (3rd year CLS gal) somehow got wind of reading this blog, contact me through friendster or email. Haha, i sound so desperate.
The gal on i'm referring to is wearing dark blue top on the left. Isn't she a wonder ? Anyway, this is a pic of the wonderful people that went for the photo shoot. All of them looked so beautifully crafted by God right ? Well, i am an atheist and i blame my mother's embryo and my father's lazy sperm. A great big thank you to Val the Violent Gal for this wonderful pic and yes, pulling your arms will make you grow taller. And yah, there is a God out there.
What even made my day BETTER was like a dream come true. I met my favourite columnist !!! Neil Humphreys. I have been a big fan of his sacarstical humour-laden style which I have learn to adopt and adapt with my own writing style and well we were just rounding up the photo shoot when Ms. Val, ahem, told the photographer whether if Neil was in because I was lika a big fan of him. Well, I became speechless in the next few seconds as the photographer just picked up the phone, dial an extension and Neil was over here in less than a minute. Well, he was a tall fella and well, standing next to him was, a towering experience to begin with.
Well here is a photo with the man himself, Mr Neil Funnies.
It was an amazing day. I would like to thank my editor, Chin Kar for the exposure. Talk more tommorrow, i'm meeting my secondary school friends and its weird seeing how we have changed in the last 3 years !!!
- Benjamin
I'm not handsome or cute. Period.
People who knows how I look like all know that I'm just a pretty average looking boy with weird facial features that is disproportionate. I have untrimmed thick eyebrows, snotty nose, crooked teeth, normal eyes, messed-up hair, thick lips and weak chin. All in all, I just don't look like a future movie star, just someone who works in a shitty 9 to 5 job waiting for retrenchment and struggling for office ventilated air. Somehow, something on the contrary happened to me.
I was at a photoshoot, kind of being selected by my dear editor to be one of the faces featured in NextStop, a publication that features all SP diplomas that is distributed to all Secondary school 'O' level prospective students looking out for their next step into the future. First of all, I don't smile nice at all. My smile simply sucks. 70% of all my photos contain me and my goofy smile with my protruding front teeth. I look like i just escapted from a retarded institution. So how can i even look good with my barely attractive facial features and my goofy appearance?
Well, it seems my personality speaks louder than looks. There were 4 guys & 4 gals. I was chosen to be the first batch of 2 guys and 2 gals. I just posed in front of the camera, just being comfortable with the whole thing but the other 3 were somehow edgy and uncomfortable and took quite a few encouraging words from the cameraman to get them warmed up to flash a natural smile. The art director and the cameraman liked me. Strangely enough, it was because I just got into my role by jumping into the sea and started paddling then drowning, I just posed naturally and smiled decently, but me, I just didn't care how goofy I looked anyway.
Somehow or another, since I was a tall fella, they asked me to move to the front and wow, I became a centrepiece. Amazingly enough, I was a natural model for them. Just without the built or looks but the instinct to know when to smile, glare, pose and tease the lenses. The art director and the cameraman just kept asking the rest to adjust and while i just did my "thang" and pose, act cute and basically look like a kooky prick.
Well my group was finished and the second group was having their turn and guess what? The art director asked me to join the second group !!! Wow, am i that good ? or was it because they needed a geeky looking guy in the photos ? It seems that both of them commented that I was the personficiation of a "poly student". Hmmm .... I take that as a compliment somehow.
I know I have been praising myself above but all of it are true facts, not a dream! I was at Raffles Place, MediaCorp's Today press studio on the 28th floor. Well, besides that boost of confidence I met loads of great-looking individuals. I can safely say the guys were model mannequin material and the gals were gushing gorgeous gigglers. There was this girl I was kinda attracted to. I forgot her name but she kept giggling at my lame jokes.
I made an effort to kept the atmosphere as light as possible by throwing in lame comments and jokes and the gal, a 3rd year CLS student, well was quite endearing. I like her personality and was really interested in knowing her more. Anyways, I know I have no hope since attractive gals are most often hooked up to some ugly boyfriend who beat me to it. (Look at my archive or my theory of pretty gal/ugly boyfriend theory). If you (3rd year CLS gal) somehow got wind of reading this blog, contact me through friendster or email. Haha, i sound so desperate.
The gal on i'm referring to is wearing dark blue top on the left. Isn't she a wonder ? Anyway, this is a pic of the wonderful people that went for the photo shoot. All of them looked so beautifully crafted by God right ? Well, i am an atheist and i blame my mother's embryo and my father's lazy sperm. A great big thank you to Val the Violent Gal for this wonderful pic and yes, pulling your arms will make you grow taller. And yah, there is a God out there.
What even made my day BETTER was like a dream come true. I met my favourite columnist !!! Neil Humphreys. I have been a big fan of his sacarstical humour-laden style which I have learn to adopt and adapt with my own writing style and well we were just rounding up the photo shoot when Ms. Val, ahem, told the photographer whether if Neil was in because I was lika a big fan of him. Well, I became speechless in the next few seconds as the photographer just picked up the phone, dial an extension and Neil was over here in less than a minute. Well, he was a tall fella and well, standing next to him was, a towering experience to begin with.
Well here is a photo with the man himself, Mr Neil Funnies.
It was an amazing day. I would like to thank my editor, Chin Kar for the exposure. Talk more tommorrow, i'm meeting my secondary school friends and its weird seeing how we have changed in the last 3 years !!!
- Benjamin
Thursday, November 27, 2003
Stranger
Well with my final year project over, there is still one more agenda to accomplish.
My video club duties. Barely less than 24 hours where the stress mounted to insurmountable heights to my presentation, i was thrown back into the duty coming face to face with the year 2s. And i was still wishing for some reasonable amount of rest but no. I got to wake up by 7 tommorrow to reach school by 9. Sigh, I lead a wonderful but tiring life.
Topic of the day: Approaching Strangers
Well due to lots of schdeuling problems here and there, it was a last minute decision to audition for people for the course video i'm doing for my school. You see, i'm the director aka leader of the project of doing up a School Course video for secondary school to come to SP. Well, as it was a last minute decision, and everything needed to be rushed, I personally called the talents myself.
This was where the problem lies. And i'm sure everyone has it too. It is something that your mother warns you not to do but you still do it anyway. Talking to strangers. At my disposal was 20 phone numbers, of beautiful people (or so called recommended by Section Heads) and I had to well, dialled their number.
It is always strange when you are talking to someone new, someone who might seem older, stranger and weirder. Everyone builds up a comfortable circle of friends and a majority simply refuses to open the gate for anybody new when they know they have enough. So, wherever you meet someone new, there is always that tinge of hesitation and struggle for acceptance to open that gate.
Strangers always seem like strangers. They have that distance away from you, be it age, race or even brain matter. People simply just cannot accept anything new in their social boundaries. Imagine someone calling you out of the blue, the first thing on your mind is to figure in this order:
A. Who is he/she?
B. What does she want from me?
C. How can I end this phone conversation as civil as possible?
Well, I called like 30+ numbers and the first thing was bewilderement, followed by shock and then fake modesty. I called them because they were beautiful and we needed them. Some were decent and polite, some were just brash and rude.
C'mon. I'm a stranger to you but is it so hard to accept one. Even though i'm asking a favour from you, I am not going to ask you to cut off your limbs, get fake boobs or strip for me. All I ask is to allow me to show me your God glorified face for a video and get out of there before I use a jackhammer to frustrate for god's unfairness to me. Other than that, accept a stranger for who they are. If someone calls my number, even by accident, I would ask them whether were they looking for me. If not, I would ask them to go to hell because they just wasted my bloody time where I could go pester more strangers for the video.
- Ben
P.S. Strangers reading this, please note. Call my number if you are beautiful because I need you for the video. Please dial 1900-GOD-PUNISH-ME-FOR-BEING-BEAUTIFUL. Thanks
Well with my final year project over, there is still one more agenda to accomplish.
My video club duties. Barely less than 24 hours where the stress mounted to insurmountable heights to my presentation, i was thrown back into the duty coming face to face with the year 2s. And i was still wishing for some reasonable amount of rest but no. I got to wake up by 7 tommorrow to reach school by 9. Sigh, I lead a wonderful but tiring life.
Topic of the day: Approaching Strangers
Well due to lots of schdeuling problems here and there, it was a last minute decision to audition for people for the course video i'm doing for my school. You see, i'm the director aka leader of the project of doing up a School Course video for secondary school to come to SP. Well, as it was a last minute decision, and everything needed to be rushed, I personally called the talents myself.
This was where the problem lies. And i'm sure everyone has it too. It is something that your mother warns you not to do but you still do it anyway. Talking to strangers. At my disposal was 20 phone numbers, of beautiful people (or so called recommended by Section Heads) and I had to well, dialled their number.
It is always strange when you are talking to someone new, someone who might seem older, stranger and weirder. Everyone builds up a comfortable circle of friends and a majority simply refuses to open the gate for anybody new when they know they have enough. So, wherever you meet someone new, there is always that tinge of hesitation and struggle for acceptance to open that gate.
Strangers always seem like strangers. They have that distance away from you, be it age, race or even brain matter. People simply just cannot accept anything new in their social boundaries. Imagine someone calling you out of the blue, the first thing on your mind is to figure in this order:
A. Who is he/she?
B. What does she want from me?
C. How can I end this phone conversation as civil as possible?
Well, I called like 30+ numbers and the first thing was bewilderement, followed by shock and then fake modesty. I called them because they were beautiful and we needed them. Some were decent and polite, some were just brash and rude.
C'mon. I'm a stranger to you but is it so hard to accept one. Even though i'm asking a favour from you, I am not going to ask you to cut off your limbs, get fake boobs or strip for me. All I ask is to allow me to show me your God glorified face for a video and get out of there before I use a jackhammer to frustrate for god's unfairness to me. Other than that, accept a stranger for who they are. If someone calls my number, even by accident, I would ask them whether were they looking for me. If not, I would ask them to go to hell because they just wasted my bloody time where I could go pester more strangers for the video.
- Ben
P.S. Strangers reading this, please note. Call my number if you are beautiful because I need you for the video. Please dial 1900-GOD-PUNISH-ME-FOR-BEING-BEAUTIFUL. Thanks
Wednesday, November 26, 2003
Monkey
Every monkey has its day.
To sum it all up, it has been a whirlwind of the events that has zoomed past these 3 days. Frustration, anger, glee, irriatation, joy and pissed off were some of my moods that I encountered through my days of preparation for my final year project. It's finally over !! My consultancy got 2nd out of 3 teams !!!
We were clearly the underdogs, if you read the previous posts before and last monday, we had that sinking feeling when we saw how the other 2 teams performed excellently at a rehearsal. Prior to this day, which was Hari Raya, my team gathered at my house, practiced, slogged and readied ourself, meeting our fate of being the 3rd team. We were saying any awards that we took was a consolation to us.
In the end, Felicia in my team got Best Presenter Award and we got the Best Tactics. Our campaign revolve the central idea of using a mascot, Libby, an animated monkey.
I like this picture the best. A crazy poseur like me. Anyway we got 2nd ! Yeah! Because a scary mime who looks like a chainsaw terrorist had more appeal than a cute and loveable monkey to young children. Well, i'm not the judge anyway but nonetheless, i'm satisified with my accomplishment.
One great thing after I realised 10 minutes after getting the envelope was a sudden strike of realization. It suddenly occured to me that no matter what position we got, I had learn valuable lessons. I'm not saying this like "I got second and i'm so sore that I lost 1st place that I have to console myself" that type of attitud but I'm saying is I got more what I bargained for. Steps along the way, I had a refresher course on Photoshop when I was doing the creatives.
All that said and done, I'm still proud of my bloody monkey, as long as he doesn't go too wacko to become a mime.
We had a celebration after that and we went to Marche and Haagen Daz at Esplanade. We ate a tonne full and everyone was ready to vomit like the Merlion. My craving for cookies and cream still exist of course but for those cookies and cream cravists like me, AVOID Midnight Cookies n Cream. It is just another revamped name of Cookies and Cream in Chocolate ice-cream that is distasteful and DESTROYS the original taste of the Cookies AND Cream.
Topic of the day: Love vs Work
It was an overly pleasant day for me, only my journey back home from City Hall kind of depressed me. I'm sure you all know of the show Tempatation island where singles mix with other long-standing couples to tempt them to break up from their current relationship. Well, try Tempatation Train where I saw couples splitting the new paper, couples cornered in an area where they cannot keep their hands to themselves and EVEN a magazine mocked my singlehood. 8 days was showing a couple position of Tay Ping Hui and Fann Wong. Sigh, all i was really tempted to chainsaw off all the clutched-couple-hands or to call Hotel 81 to make a booking for them.
I mean, I enjoy my single life. I never had a relationship for the past 3 years. Am i normal ? Or do I have different priorities from others ? I'm focusing on my education and increasing my experience in the expertise of the mass communication field of writing, designing and video production. I see people younger than me like 14 yr olds sharing an ice-cream cone at McDonalds. I would be lying if I did not feel a tinge of jealousy but on the other hand, I'm perfectly contented with keeping my hands busy.
The worst scenario is to see me end up as a 40 year old wrinkld succesful bachelor. Someone who has all the 5 C's except the most important C, the Care for another individual. If I end up like this, I shouldnt be considered a human being if i end up being a hardworking but uncaring bachelor and all that I would care about would be whether should I call the reception of Hotel 81 or buy a chainsaw.
I foresee this possibility. Let us hope I dont fall down this category of being miserable, lonely but succesful person. It seems that a price that success has to pay is your loss of touch with the human emotional world. This great expense should be duly weigh upon before any action. Have you sacrificed your family to put in more working hours? Well, I see the world will be facing this possibility instead with us evolutionizing into greater heights. Let us dont fall off the tower and end up being a lifeless carcass.
- Ben
Every monkey has its day.
To sum it all up, it has been a whirlwind of the events that has zoomed past these 3 days. Frustration, anger, glee, irriatation, joy and pissed off were some of my moods that I encountered through my days of preparation for my final year project. It's finally over !! My consultancy got 2nd out of 3 teams !!!
We were clearly the underdogs, if you read the previous posts before and last monday, we had that sinking feeling when we saw how the other 2 teams performed excellently at a rehearsal. Prior to this day, which was Hari Raya, my team gathered at my house, practiced, slogged and readied ourself, meeting our fate of being the 3rd team. We were saying any awards that we took was a consolation to us.
In the end, Felicia in my team got Best Presenter Award and we got the Best Tactics. Our campaign revolve the central idea of using a mascot, Libby, an animated monkey.
I like this picture the best. A crazy poseur like me. Anyway we got 2nd ! Yeah! Because a scary mime who looks like a chainsaw terrorist had more appeal than a cute and loveable monkey to young children. Well, i'm not the judge anyway but nonetheless, i'm satisified with my accomplishment.
One great thing after I realised 10 minutes after getting the envelope was a sudden strike of realization. It suddenly occured to me that no matter what position we got, I had learn valuable lessons. I'm not saying this like "I got second and i'm so sore that I lost 1st place that I have to console myself" that type of attitud but I'm saying is I got more what I bargained for. Steps along the way, I had a refresher course on Photoshop when I was doing the creatives.
All that said and done, I'm still proud of my bloody monkey, as long as he doesn't go too wacko to become a mime.
We had a celebration after that and we went to Marche and Haagen Daz at Esplanade. We ate a tonne full and everyone was ready to vomit like the Merlion. My craving for cookies and cream still exist of course but for those cookies and cream cravists like me, AVOID Midnight Cookies n Cream. It is just another revamped name of Cookies and Cream in Chocolate ice-cream that is distasteful and DESTROYS the original taste of the Cookies AND Cream.
Topic of the day: Love vs Work
It was an overly pleasant day for me, only my journey back home from City Hall kind of depressed me. I'm sure you all know of the show Tempatation island where singles mix with other long-standing couples to tempt them to break up from their current relationship. Well, try Tempatation Train where I saw couples splitting the new paper, couples cornered in an area where they cannot keep their hands to themselves and EVEN a magazine mocked my singlehood. 8 days was showing a couple position of Tay Ping Hui and Fann Wong. Sigh, all i was really tempted to chainsaw off all the clutched-couple-hands or to call Hotel 81 to make a booking for them.
I mean, I enjoy my single life. I never had a relationship for the past 3 years. Am i normal ? Or do I have different priorities from others ? I'm focusing on my education and increasing my experience in the expertise of the mass communication field of writing, designing and video production. I see people younger than me like 14 yr olds sharing an ice-cream cone at McDonalds. I would be lying if I did not feel a tinge of jealousy but on the other hand, I'm perfectly contented with keeping my hands busy.
The worst scenario is to see me end up as a 40 year old wrinkld succesful bachelor. Someone who has all the 5 C's except the most important C, the Care for another individual. If I end up like this, I shouldnt be considered a human being if i end up being a hardworking but uncaring bachelor and all that I would care about would be whether should I call the reception of Hotel 81 or buy a chainsaw.
I foresee this possibility. Let us hope I dont fall down this category of being miserable, lonely but succesful person. It seems that a price that success has to pay is your loss of touch with the human emotional world. This great expense should be duly weigh upon before any action. Have you sacrificed your family to put in more working hours? Well, I see the world will be facing this possibility instead with us evolutionizing into greater heights. Let us dont fall off the tower and end up being a lifeless carcass.
- Ben
Sunday, November 23, 2003
Break-ups
It's been a hell of a hectic week. Going to school from 9 to 9, it is enjoyable as sitting on a durian. There will be perks in the end of course and my hard work will pay off but i gotta slog for this upcoming presentation so wish me luck.
Here I go again.
Topic of the day: Breaking Up
I profess. I ain't an experiencd person who can advice or even discuss with other people regarding matters of love. However, i'm an impartial person who sees both sides of the coin by cutting open the body of conversation, spreading out the intestines of the scenario and scrutinise everypiece and give a final diagnosis of what should be done. I'm the "doctor" but it is up to "patient" on what his next step of movement is next.
So i bring you to the crux of the story. I have a friend called Miss Q. Well, Q has been with a boyfriend for a pretty long time like more than 6 months. She conferred to me her relationship problems what she told me that when she went for a one week holiday, she did not even thought about her boyfriend, Z. It has been a rather awkward situation since she came back and since she is so busy, she felt the best for the both of them to break up.
The reason being is that Q and Z are very different like the Phoenix and the Loch Ness monster. Both go to watch movies but one prefer gory movies while the other loves romantic comedies. Q has a more open minded type of dress sense but Z hates it, opting her to be more conservative. As you can see, they are poles apart but they do share some rare similarities but you get the entire picture i'm driving at.
Opposites attract. But they don't last very long. To quote my classmate, Felicia a long time back. The conclusion of the above story is they broke up and what i would like to extract out from the story is the breaking up scenario.
The reason why a guy would MOST PROBABLY break up with his girlfriend is that ....
A. The girl is cheating on him
B. Both have unresolved differences
C. He feels that she is too good for her
The reason why a girl would MOST PROBABLY break up with his boyfriend is that ....
A. The guy is cheating on her
B. She suspects the guy is cheating on her
C. Both have unresolved differences
D. The guy is petty
E. She feels that he is too good for her
F. She feel that she is too good for him
In most scenarios, it is everytime the guy who gets hurt from the relationship. Yes, you heard me, the GUY. You must be wondering WHY? Is Benjamin a chauvanist? Of course not.
This is why. A guy loses all his investment money when dating the gal. The guy OFTENS has to bring the girl home thus incurring more travel expenses. The guy OFTENS carries the girl's load either making him looking sissy or cowardly which will end up him being the more tired out individual. The guy OFTENS gives in to the girl. Most of the hurt are monetary losses for the guy.
A girl on the other hand faces more emotional hurt. They ponder about it for 2 weeks whether this man would give her beautiful children, a nice condo, great sex and the company they would have together at old folks home. After which, she will take 2 months to decide and evaluate her options. In which she chooses a break up, she will take 2 hours to tell to the guy. The gal would then take less than 2 minutes to wave a cab either home or to Mohd Sultan to find guys for a fling for 2 months, 2 weeks and 2 hours. Most of the hurt for the women is the usage of brain cells of thinking too much.
You must be chanting. Ben is a pig. Well, let me prove to you not.
Just recently, I have a friend whose girlfriend went overseas and broke up with him, less than 2 daysshe reached there.
The reason, she found someone there. Well that friend of mine spent loads of money for her and even sent something expensive to her over there as it was her birthday. My friend ended up broke for the end of the month while that gal is having flings overseas studying.
The breaking up game is so easy for gals. Modern women break up and move on with their heart intact, with hope of finding another partner. Modern men break up and move on with their heart intact but with many holes in their wallet, with hope of finding another partner who wont be like the last leech that broke up with him.
Breakups are no easy thing for anyone. Once you had one, you can never get back with him/her again as the holes are drilled, the damage is done and the split is wide open. There is never any chance to mend it back and even so, the gap for mending is hard to reconcile with as everyone knows that history always repeat itself.
If you are in a relationship right now and you had any slight notions of breaking up, do so now. It is a matter of time before you break up. If you are not in a relationship now like me and the only thing you want to do is break up a couple becoz u like that guy or gal, then my advice is dont do it. It is just not good for your karma. If you happend to do it though, it is a matter of time before you are called a bastard or a slut.
- Benjamin
*Names were changed to protect the innocent. My name is not changed because i'm giving the innocent a chance to sue me because I published their story here
It's been a hell of a hectic week. Going to school from 9 to 9, it is enjoyable as sitting on a durian. There will be perks in the end of course and my hard work will pay off but i gotta slog for this upcoming presentation so wish me luck.
Here I go again.
Topic of the day: Breaking Up
I profess. I ain't an experiencd person who can advice or even discuss with other people regarding matters of love. However, i'm an impartial person who sees both sides of the coin by cutting open the body of conversation, spreading out the intestines of the scenario and scrutinise everypiece and give a final diagnosis of what should be done. I'm the "doctor" but it is up to "patient" on what his next step of movement is next.
So i bring you to the crux of the story. I have a friend called Miss Q. Well, Q has been with a boyfriend for a pretty long time like more than 6 months. She conferred to me her relationship problems what she told me that when she went for a one week holiday, she did not even thought about her boyfriend, Z. It has been a rather awkward situation since she came back and since she is so busy, she felt the best for the both of them to break up.
The reason being is that Q and Z are very different like the Phoenix and the Loch Ness monster. Both go to watch movies but one prefer gory movies while the other loves romantic comedies. Q has a more open minded type of dress sense but Z hates it, opting her to be more conservative. As you can see, they are poles apart but they do share some rare similarities but you get the entire picture i'm driving at.
Opposites attract. But they don't last very long. To quote my classmate, Felicia a long time back. The conclusion of the above story is they broke up and what i would like to extract out from the story is the breaking up scenario.
The reason why a guy would MOST PROBABLY break up with his girlfriend is that ....
A. The girl is cheating on him
B. Both have unresolved differences
C. He feels that she is too good for her
The reason why a girl would MOST PROBABLY break up with his boyfriend is that ....
A. The guy is cheating on her
B. She suspects the guy is cheating on her
C. Both have unresolved differences
D. The guy is petty
E. She feels that he is too good for her
F. She feel that she is too good for him
In most scenarios, it is everytime the guy who gets hurt from the relationship. Yes, you heard me, the GUY. You must be wondering WHY? Is Benjamin a chauvanist? Of course not.
This is why. A guy loses all his investment money when dating the gal. The guy OFTENS has to bring the girl home thus incurring more travel expenses. The guy OFTENS carries the girl's load either making him looking sissy or cowardly which will end up him being the more tired out individual. The guy OFTENS gives in to the girl. Most of the hurt are monetary losses for the guy.
A girl on the other hand faces more emotional hurt. They ponder about it for 2 weeks whether this man would give her beautiful children, a nice condo, great sex and the company they would have together at old folks home. After which, she will take 2 months to decide and evaluate her options. In which she chooses a break up, she will take 2 hours to tell to the guy. The gal would then take less than 2 minutes to wave a cab either home or to Mohd Sultan to find guys for a fling for 2 months, 2 weeks and 2 hours. Most of the hurt for the women is the usage of brain cells of thinking too much.
You must be chanting. Ben is a pig. Well, let me prove to you not.
Just recently, I have a friend whose girlfriend went overseas and broke up with him, less than 2 daysshe reached there.
The reason, she found someone there. Well that friend of mine spent loads of money for her and even sent something expensive to her over there as it was her birthday. My friend ended up broke for the end of the month while that gal is having flings overseas studying.
The breaking up game is so easy for gals. Modern women break up and move on with their heart intact, with hope of finding another partner. Modern men break up and move on with their heart intact but with many holes in their wallet, with hope of finding another partner who wont be like the last leech that broke up with him.
Breakups are no easy thing for anyone. Once you had one, you can never get back with him/her again as the holes are drilled, the damage is done and the split is wide open. There is never any chance to mend it back and even so, the gap for mending is hard to reconcile with as everyone knows that history always repeat itself.
If you are in a relationship right now and you had any slight notions of breaking up, do so now. It is a matter of time before you break up. If you are not in a relationship now like me and the only thing you want to do is break up a couple becoz u like that guy or gal, then my advice is dont do it. It is just not good for your karma. If you happend to do it though, it is a matter of time before you are called a bastard or a slut.
- Benjamin
*Names were changed to protect the innocent. My name is not changed because i'm giving the innocent a chance to sue me because I published their story here
Thursday, November 20, 2003
MRT-travel
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee !!!!
Well, as you all can see, i'm just so happy.
I have finished the creatives and mounting it. All that is needed to be done now is to memorise the script and present it to the client this 26th Wednesday. Come and support me !! haha. I will be presenting to National Library Board. Wish me luck.
Okay now to my daily senseless sacarstical ramblings.
Topic of the day: People on MRT trains
I'm a daily commuter of MRT trains. Travelling to and forth, i estimate i spent 4% of my lifetime on the train. There is a few things you can do on the train. Sit, stand, sit on the floor. Then, when you are in these various positions, you either, read newspaper, chat on the phone, read a book or dig your nose. This is where it gets interesting.
People jostle for space, to get as much circle of freedom, that is why people move to the centre of the train or sit on seats where they don't share the same breathing with the any person to their left or right. This gets complicated during office hours. The crowd gets enormous and the most lethal things on these trains are not people standing OVER the yellow line but instead, it reeks and occupies loads of space so that people beside you will move away.
You must be thinking body odour or farting gas. Well, i am not referring to that. I will one day to fart or B/O you but not now in this blog. Instead, they are morning tabloids. Yeah, i don't know about you people but the smell of fresh newspaper makes me wanna puke. Well the smell of one isn't that bad but when 20 newspaper crammed in a place where only 21 people can stand, that would make you the odd one out without the smell. I was tempted to fart so that I gained more space in the train but people spread their newspaper so wide as though they were in their toilet cubicle shitting.
What makes it worse is the very fact that these crisp tabloids have sharp edges. So, when I enter the train, I can scratched or even mauled by tabloids spreading themselves. I resist snatching the newspaper and crunching it in front of their face.
You must be thinking. Ben must be illiterate because he doesn't read free newspaper. Then, Ben tells you now that I would like to read newspaper at my own leisure. Now when people peek over your shoulder, bump your elbow or scratch your face with the side of a free tabloid.
I am a anti-free-newspaper-group due to the harm they cause to me. NOT to the environment. Whoever knows which person invented the idea of free tabloids, I'm going over there to fart in his very face. Better yet, i'll scratch him with my newspaper.
- Ben
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee !!!!
Well, as you all can see, i'm just so happy.
I have finished the creatives and mounting it. All that is needed to be done now is to memorise the script and present it to the client this 26th Wednesday. Come and support me !! haha. I will be presenting to National Library Board. Wish me luck.
Okay now to my daily senseless sacarstical ramblings.
Topic of the day: People on MRT trains
I'm a daily commuter of MRT trains. Travelling to and forth, i estimate i spent 4% of my lifetime on the train. There is a few things you can do on the train. Sit, stand, sit on the floor. Then, when you are in these various positions, you either, read newspaper, chat on the phone, read a book or dig your nose. This is where it gets interesting.
People jostle for space, to get as much circle of freedom, that is why people move to the centre of the train or sit on seats where they don't share the same breathing with the any person to their left or right. This gets complicated during office hours. The crowd gets enormous and the most lethal things on these trains are not people standing OVER the yellow line but instead, it reeks and occupies loads of space so that people beside you will move away.
You must be thinking body odour or farting gas. Well, i am not referring to that. I will one day to fart or B/O you but not now in this blog. Instead, they are morning tabloids. Yeah, i don't know about you people but the smell of fresh newspaper makes me wanna puke. Well the smell of one isn't that bad but when 20 newspaper crammed in a place where only 21 people can stand, that would make you the odd one out without the smell. I was tempted to fart so that I gained more space in the train but people spread their newspaper so wide as though they were in their toilet cubicle shitting.
What makes it worse is the very fact that these crisp tabloids have sharp edges. So, when I enter the train, I can scratched or even mauled by tabloids spreading themselves. I resist snatching the newspaper and crunching it in front of their face.
You must be thinking. Ben must be illiterate because he doesn't read free newspaper. Then, Ben tells you now that I would like to read newspaper at my own leisure. Now when people peek over your shoulder, bump your elbow or scratch your face with the side of a free tabloid.
I am a anti-free-newspaper-group due to the harm they cause to me. NOT to the environment. Whoever knows which person invented the idea of free tabloids, I'm going over there to fart in his very face. Better yet, i'll scratch him with my newspaper.
- Ben
Monday, November 17, 2003
Saturday, November 15, 2003
Competitveness
The collapse of the Singapore economy.
Now that I have your attention. Where do you think the future lies ahead for Singapore? The new millenium beckons for new people. I normally don't talk about politics or economy as they are boring but since I have to write an article about it, might as well blabber my own slanted opinion towards what lies ahead for Singapore in a young simple-minded Singaporean.
Recent hype about competition made the news recently on the government's model on various industries. Let me give you a quick rundown if you ain't a Singaporean or a country bumpkin living on Kusu island and Straits Times is the timezone that you follow when you are on a kelong. Singapore has been a succesful developing nation, gaining strength day by day, reaching its peaks of economic success with flourishing trade and loads of imports and exports, money was flowing through PAP's white pockets in the early 1990s.
Well, then came the 1998 & 2002 recession slammed the middle-class Singaporean majority back to oblivion and PAP finally had to sweat their way through. With globalization upon their hands, PAP had to change their model of being a successful nation within the region but to be a global player. The fact is that this change was to to comply with our "Allies", that are mainly the Western powers. We have to adopt the GTO practices and hence, the operative word of this "World" model is "competitiveness".
Therefore, our government looked into the various sectors, opening up to foreign players but also restricting their boundaries in terms of controlling the local sector here. Then, came the reprecussions of this system which I will share with you later.
2 years ago, because of this "World" model, organizations have to be competitive by being TRANSPARENT in their accounting practics. So first came the banking industry. Singapore only wanted 3 main banks to operate in Singapore and the prescene of 6 banks was simply an eyesore for these men in white. The banks scramble to meet their dateline, merging left right and centre. As you all know, POSB merged with DBS and hence, by merging, they closed down a few branches, a few ATM machines that caused loads of inconvenience for us consumers. As they were reconsolidating, citizens had to suffer from moving their accounts, their life savings and their unit trusts to other banks swiftly and queues were formed, fights were resulted, more jail terms for these queuers, queuers pay money to government to let them out, so governement scores. 1-0.
Last month, came the medical industry. There were like 10 hospitals and a handful were private hospitals and boom! Bad publicity regarding expensive charges to citizens and wham! the price menu for breast implants and anal rectum openings went skyrocketing to become more competitive, in other words, cheaper for the consumer. Yeah !!! 1-1 an equalizer as consumers FINALLY gain something from a change in governement policy.
Then came the public transport model. Wow, this was a joker man. In 1996, The North-east line tender was only entitled to Tibs or SBS and the govt didnt allow SMRT to apply so as to make it "competitive". Recently, the transport minister said that they had to "re-think" this model as SBS was making heavy losses from the NEL and the minister was contemplating whether their choice was valid or not like they should have given it to SBS. Valid or not, this worsen the situation for the public. From what I gather, it seems that in order to get out of the red, SBS had to increase fares for those that travelled on the NEL line. Painful for the Seng Kang and Punggol people pockets. As the governement made a wrong choice in this decision, resulting in drastic reprecussions to the nation, they score another point as they disspaoint and aggitate people living in the north-east. Score, 2-1 to the government.
Now, being a media student myself, this was a painful paragraph to write. The media industry also reshuffled in the early 2000 to make way for competition like Channel U and Channel i and for MediaCorp, Streats. Then came the childish battle as you see on "Which is the 2nd most read tabloid in Singapore?" and just reported last week in the news, EVERYONE was making losses because of the lack of advertising revenue and support. Apparently, the nexus from the common media like TV and newspaper was due to the advent of Internet where it has grown strongly to provide practically everything the common media can do like Online broadcasts, Online news and Online porn. As the media industry is reeling from the loss, the consumers are indeed glad for a change on what they see on their little black box as they had more choices. I think little people care whether the broadcasting stations win awards or make money, they just want to watch what pathethic local programs they can watch admist their holes in the pockets from travelling on MRT. Hence, the comeback where the score is now tied 2-2.
Now, the score was done for fun. But the implication here is serious. Who will win in the end? The government or the people. In a democracy, the government is a slave to the population as what they do is a public service as they are equally paid on par. The population put their trust onto the government and hence, whatever decision they make, we follow. We don't like it, we protest (to no avail, of course). The Singaporean governement in adopting the Western model of competitiveness might be too hasty, as the results are evident now.
Questions to think about. What will be next ? Will it be the education system or housing blocks? Will our taxes be affected next or will we see more foreign competitors? Sigh, where is the Singaporean governement leading us, and where will we end up next? Food for thought.
- Benjamin
Note: I did not meant this to be too overtly political, just a critical analysis from a normal Singaporean citizen who worries about his rice bowl and the colour of his underwear. I did not mention about our telecommunications industry but that is another whole new ball game worth exploring. Hope ya all are not bored by now.
The collapse of the Singapore economy.
Now that I have your attention. Where do you think the future lies ahead for Singapore? The new millenium beckons for new people. I normally don't talk about politics or economy as they are boring but since I have to write an article about it, might as well blabber my own slanted opinion towards what lies ahead for Singapore in a young simple-minded Singaporean.
Recent hype about competition made the news recently on the government's model on various industries. Let me give you a quick rundown if you ain't a Singaporean or a country bumpkin living on Kusu island and Straits Times is the timezone that you follow when you are on a kelong. Singapore has been a succesful developing nation, gaining strength day by day, reaching its peaks of economic success with flourishing trade and loads of imports and exports, money was flowing through PAP's white pockets in the early 1990s.
Well, then came the 1998 & 2002 recession slammed the middle-class Singaporean majority back to oblivion and PAP finally had to sweat their way through. With globalization upon their hands, PAP had to change their model of being a successful nation within the region but to be a global player. The fact is that this change was to to comply with our "Allies", that are mainly the Western powers. We have to adopt the GTO practices and hence, the operative word of this "World" model is "competitiveness".
Therefore, our government looked into the various sectors, opening up to foreign players but also restricting their boundaries in terms of controlling the local sector here. Then, came the reprecussions of this system which I will share with you later.
2 years ago, because of this "World" model, organizations have to be competitive by being TRANSPARENT in their accounting practics. So first came the banking industry. Singapore only wanted 3 main banks to operate in Singapore and the prescene of 6 banks was simply an eyesore for these men in white. The banks scramble to meet their dateline, merging left right and centre. As you all know, POSB merged with DBS and hence, by merging, they closed down a few branches, a few ATM machines that caused loads of inconvenience for us consumers. As they were reconsolidating, citizens had to suffer from moving their accounts, their life savings and their unit trusts to other banks swiftly and queues were formed, fights were resulted, more jail terms for these queuers, queuers pay money to government to let them out, so governement scores. 1-0.
Last month, came the medical industry. There were like 10 hospitals and a handful were private hospitals and boom! Bad publicity regarding expensive charges to citizens and wham! the price menu for breast implants and anal rectum openings went skyrocketing to become more competitive, in other words, cheaper for the consumer. Yeah !!! 1-1 an equalizer as consumers FINALLY gain something from a change in governement policy.
Then came the public transport model. Wow, this was a joker man. In 1996, The North-east line tender was only entitled to Tibs or SBS and the govt didnt allow SMRT to apply so as to make it "competitive". Recently, the transport minister said that they had to "re-think" this model as SBS was making heavy losses from the NEL and the minister was contemplating whether their choice was valid or not like they should have given it to SBS. Valid or not, this worsen the situation for the public. From what I gather, it seems that in order to get out of the red, SBS had to increase fares for those that travelled on the NEL line. Painful for the Seng Kang and Punggol people pockets. As the governement made a wrong choice in this decision, resulting in drastic reprecussions to the nation, they score another point as they disspaoint and aggitate people living in the north-east. Score, 2-1 to the government.
Now, being a media student myself, this was a painful paragraph to write. The media industry also reshuffled in the early 2000 to make way for competition like Channel U and Channel i and for MediaCorp, Streats. Then came the childish battle as you see on "Which is the 2nd most read tabloid in Singapore?" and just reported last week in the news, EVERYONE was making losses because of the lack of advertising revenue and support. Apparently, the nexus from the common media like TV and newspaper was due to the advent of Internet where it has grown strongly to provide practically everything the common media can do like Online broadcasts, Online news and Online porn. As the media industry is reeling from the loss, the consumers are indeed glad for a change on what they see on their little black box as they had more choices. I think little people care whether the broadcasting stations win awards or make money, they just want to watch what pathethic local programs they can watch admist their holes in the pockets from travelling on MRT. Hence, the comeback where the score is now tied 2-2.
Now, the score was done for fun. But the implication here is serious. Who will win in the end? The government or the people. In a democracy, the government is a slave to the population as what they do is a public service as they are equally paid on par. The population put their trust onto the government and hence, whatever decision they make, we follow. We don't like it, we protest (to no avail, of course). The Singaporean governement in adopting the Western model of competitiveness might be too hasty, as the results are evident now.
Questions to think about. What will be next ? Will it be the education system or housing blocks? Will our taxes be affected next or will we see more foreign competitors? Sigh, where is the Singaporean governement leading us, and where will we end up next? Food for thought.
- Benjamin
Note: I did not meant this to be too overtly political, just a critical analysis from a normal Singaporean citizen who worries about his rice bowl and the colour of his underwear. I did not mention about our telecommunications industry but that is another whole new ball game worth exploring. Hope ya all are not bored by now.
Friday, November 14, 2003
Thursday, November 13, 2003
Unhappiness
There are too many sorrows in the real world. War, family crisis, relationship problems, enviromental destruction, my mother's cooking .... It's good to know that you can put that all behind when you come onto the virtual world
Be it you come online for games to perk yourself, or for an online chat to relate to another. There are so many things to do online for leisure, for entertainment, for relaxation. So can anyone tell me why the hell people like to bring their sorrows to this world too?
One thing that I have noticed from reading other people's blog is that they like to express their sad emotions about certain aspects of life like their relationships with colleagues or their failure to achieve something. It is their blog and it is their privilege to do whatever they want. It is also my privilege to criticise them for their insistence from translating what should be left in the human world.
You see, they write poetry or sop stories. Boo hoo !!! Like that is going to change anything at all. I mean, yah, you can write your emotions or how you feel once in a while but it is rather pathetic when you have a blog that keeps whining and whining and whining till blogger cannot accept the word count.
Transcending to the real world, it is wonderful if everyone became an eternal humourist. Laughter is the best cure of medicine be it for any worries, that is why I wrote this blog. This blog reflects my zany humour with daily teaspoons of reality in Singapore. If I wanted to whine and grovel at you, there is a hotline at 1900-911-8304. I'm sure you will have loads of robotic answering machines willing to hear you wails and tales.
My advice is to stop depressing everyone online. We have our own worries and coming online is one of our various escapes that makes us smile, makes us laugh and make us shower with the bliss that people are enjoying life as it is. Of course you will face troubles and worries once in a while but there is always something positive to take out of any negativity. Laugh at what lies online and not fret what troubles you as there is always something bright ahead.
- Benjamin
P.S. I should be a preacher or a suicide counseller.
There are too many sorrows in the real world. War, family crisis, relationship problems, enviromental destruction, my mother's cooking .... It's good to know that you can put that all behind when you come onto the virtual world
Be it you come online for games to perk yourself, or for an online chat to relate to another. There are so many things to do online for leisure, for entertainment, for relaxation. So can anyone tell me why the hell people like to bring their sorrows to this world too?
One thing that I have noticed from reading other people's blog is that they like to express their sad emotions about certain aspects of life like their relationships with colleagues or their failure to achieve something. It is their blog and it is their privilege to do whatever they want. It is also my privilege to criticise them for their insistence from translating what should be left in the human world.
You see, they write poetry or sop stories. Boo hoo !!! Like that is going to change anything at all. I mean, yah, you can write your emotions or how you feel once in a while but it is rather pathetic when you have a blog that keeps whining and whining and whining till blogger cannot accept the word count.
Transcending to the real world, it is wonderful if everyone became an eternal humourist. Laughter is the best cure of medicine be it for any worries, that is why I wrote this blog. This blog reflects my zany humour with daily teaspoons of reality in Singapore. If I wanted to whine and grovel at you, there is a hotline at 1900-911-8304. I'm sure you will have loads of robotic answering machines willing to hear you wails and tales.
My advice is to stop depressing everyone online. We have our own worries and coming online is one of our various escapes that makes us smile, makes us laugh and make us shower with the bliss that people are enjoying life as it is. Of course you will face troubles and worries once in a while but there is always something positive to take out of any negativity. Laugh at what lies online and not fret what troubles you as there is always something bright ahead.
- Benjamin
P.S. I should be a preacher or a suicide counseller.
Wednesday, November 12, 2003
Weight
Should you be fat ?
That is the question. You really ask yourself whether you should just be fated to look like an oversized pear when you have cookies and cream ice cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Scary huh ? Well, for your info, I have consumed 1 tub of fat and the other tub will be in the refrigerator, for a long time to come.
For dinner, i had 5 tu tu kuah, 1 muah chee, 2 cups of ice-cream and 1 plate of Hainanese chicken rice. In other words, why should I not be fat? After all the rubbish that I ate, especially Calbee BBQ potato chips (my other craving) which I had during my exam periods. Somehow, fat only grows at one place on my body. My tummy. I'm only fat there becoz of the big bulge everytime i see myself at the bathroom mirror(i'm not a narccisitic fella if that's what you're thinking).
I'm a glutton but somehow I'm not really punished by it. People eat nachos and they grow a double chin. I eat nachos and i grow one centimetres of waist. Some people are really envious of me, astonished by my body's vitality to eat junk food and convert it to body mass that does not place too high over the 25 of my BMI.
Some people are born thin, and some people are just born to take up two places on the MRT train. I'm blessed I guess but my barrier will be broken one day. I'll cross that line when I can't see my penis anymore which is a scenario I can't imagine but just needed to type here to gross out those people who are eating junk food as they surf my blog.
Like i said in my previous 25 entries before, I intend to reduce that tummy of mine during the holidays. In response, all I did was burden me with extra stress to burn off that calories. I have never learned the skill of channeling that stress to that flab. Maybe I deserve to be fat, there are too much sticks and twigs around. No wonder Godzilla likes destroying Tokyo, Maybe I should send him an invitation here, I'm sure he wouldn't mind helping a friend and doing the world a noble deed and stamp his foot over the Anorexic Anoymous Association at Raffles Place.
What an interesting thought. = )
My meal for the day that will make me burn in hell
A pic of me and my sin
Should you be fat ?
That is the question. You really ask yourself whether you should just be fated to look like an oversized pear when you have cookies and cream ice cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Scary huh ? Well, for your info, I have consumed 1 tub of fat and the other tub will be in the refrigerator, for a long time to come.
For dinner, i had 5 tu tu kuah, 1 muah chee, 2 cups of ice-cream and 1 plate of Hainanese chicken rice. In other words, why should I not be fat? After all the rubbish that I ate, especially Calbee BBQ potato chips (my other craving) which I had during my exam periods. Somehow, fat only grows at one place on my body. My tummy. I'm only fat there becoz of the big bulge everytime i see myself at the bathroom mirror(i'm not a narccisitic fella if that's what you're thinking).
I'm a glutton but somehow I'm not really punished by it. People eat nachos and they grow a double chin. I eat nachos and i grow one centimetres of waist. Some people are really envious of me, astonished by my body's vitality to eat junk food and convert it to body mass that does not place too high over the 25 of my BMI.
Some people are born thin, and some people are just born to take up two places on the MRT train. I'm blessed I guess but my barrier will be broken one day. I'll cross that line when I can't see my penis anymore which is a scenario I can't imagine but just needed to type here to gross out those people who are eating junk food as they surf my blog.
Like i said in my previous 25 entries before, I intend to reduce that tummy of mine during the holidays. In response, all I did was burden me with extra stress to burn off that calories. I have never learned the skill of channeling that stress to that flab. Maybe I deserve to be fat, there are too much sticks and twigs around. No wonder Godzilla likes destroying Tokyo, Maybe I should send him an invitation here, I'm sure he wouldn't mind helping a friend and doing the world a noble deed and stamp his foot over the Anorexic Anoymous Association at Raffles Place.
What an interesting thought. = )
My meal for the day that will make me burn in hell
A pic of me and my sin
Tuesday, November 11, 2003
Sin
Cookies and Cream ice cream.
The thought of this sin is too tempting too resist. The notion of this craving stuck in my mind for 3 hours before I took any attempts to get up from my bed to curb it. Ice-cream, vanila or cookiesncream, is delish. I can't help stop thinking about it and so, I took my bicycle and cycled to 7-eleven.
Now, I ain't no bad cyclist but it has been several years since I rode on one. I have roughly sat on a bicycle 4 times in the past 3 years and I could ride pretty well. Recently, my father repaired a Gary Fisher bicycle and I took that revamped bicycle to grab that cookies and cream ice-cream of mine. You can obviously see, cookies n cream ice-cream practically flooded my mind, even as I'm blogging now.
So, there I was riding and I felt my wallet was uncomfortably placed on my shorts pocket and I had to re-adjust if I did not want to turn up at the store without money to buy my favourite ice-cream. Hence, I pressed the brakes.
BAM! The bicycle really prove its worth after its "renovation". As soon as I hit the brakes hardly, off my buttocks flew away from the seat and as my hands held tightly to the reins, my body became jumbled up with the bike and crash, I hit the pavement, like crash dummies in a test car experiment. I scraped my knee cap and my pride as I saw one lady at the bus stop looking at me with an OMG gap with her yellow teeth from the distance. I gathered myself, embarrased from this minor fiasco of not knowing the strength of my bike's brakes. Was I wounded? Definently, but the thought of cookies n cream ice-cream being sold out was unthinkable as I peddaled furiously with me bleeding, without a heck but for only one thought. Cookies n cream ice-cream.
The journey back home was safe. In tow, i had two tubs of Wall's Cookies and Cream ice-cream and my grin was like the Disappearing cat in 'Alice in Wonderland'. Come to think of it now, I would gladly break an arm or a leg just for that taste of Cookies and Cream ice-cream. Going to enjoy that now, will be back later to tell you how I went to heaven and came back to relate to you to my fantasy.
- Benjamin
Note: 7-eleven does not sell cookies and cream ice-cream. It's always sold out. Visit your Chinese provision shops or you ah pu nei nei shop for it. They are always in stock. Or you could whine to the uncle how you break your knee on the way there and he'll put Oreos in your Vanila ice cream for free. = )
Note.Note: Cookies and Cream is a more mentioned word here than "the" or "with" in this post.
Cookies and Cream ice cream.
The thought of this sin is too tempting too resist. The notion of this craving stuck in my mind for 3 hours before I took any attempts to get up from my bed to curb it. Ice-cream, vanila or cookiesncream, is delish. I can't help stop thinking about it and so, I took my bicycle and cycled to 7-eleven.
Now, I ain't no bad cyclist but it has been several years since I rode on one. I have roughly sat on a bicycle 4 times in the past 3 years and I could ride pretty well. Recently, my father repaired a Gary Fisher bicycle and I took that revamped bicycle to grab that cookies and cream ice-cream of mine. You can obviously see, cookies n cream ice-cream practically flooded my mind, even as I'm blogging now.
So, there I was riding and I felt my wallet was uncomfortably placed on my shorts pocket and I had to re-adjust if I did not want to turn up at the store without money to buy my favourite ice-cream. Hence, I pressed the brakes.
BAM! The bicycle really prove its worth after its "renovation". As soon as I hit the brakes hardly, off my buttocks flew away from the seat and as my hands held tightly to the reins, my body became jumbled up with the bike and crash, I hit the pavement, like crash dummies in a test car experiment. I scraped my knee cap and my pride as I saw one lady at the bus stop looking at me with an OMG gap with her yellow teeth from the distance. I gathered myself, embarrased from this minor fiasco of not knowing the strength of my bike's brakes. Was I wounded? Definently, but the thought of cookies n cream ice-cream being sold out was unthinkable as I peddaled furiously with me bleeding, without a heck but for only one thought. Cookies n cream ice-cream.
The journey back home was safe. In tow, i had two tubs of Wall's Cookies and Cream ice-cream and my grin was like the Disappearing cat in 'Alice in Wonderland'. Come to think of it now, I would gladly break an arm or a leg just for that taste of Cookies and Cream ice-cream. Going to enjoy that now, will be back later to tell you how I went to heaven and came back to relate to you to my fantasy.
- Benjamin
Note: 7-eleven does not sell cookies and cream ice-cream. It's always sold out. Visit your Chinese provision shops or you ah pu nei nei shop for it. They are always in stock. Or you could whine to the uncle how you break your knee on the way there and he'll put Oreos in your Vanila ice cream for free. = )
Note.Note: Cookies and Cream is a more mentioned word here than "the" or "with" in this post.
Monday, November 10, 2003
Humour
Stumbled onto a funny site. It will definently spice up your Mondays.
The story of the Turtle & the Hare
The Matrix: Chinese Heinenken
Italians & Europeans: The Difference
Well, after those laffs. I'm sure you will be ready for your daily dosage of sacrasm and downright obscene opinions by moi.
Did nothing much today except working on work. What else?
The topic for the day is : Beggars
I was coming home from watching the Matrix Revolutions and as I stepped off the escalator to the bus stop, a man aged 40 plus approached me.
40+ man: "Ah di ah, what time is it now?"
Me being the ever sincere and helpful person, gave him the time.
Me: "10.30pm"
40+ man: "Ah di ah, you got change anot for $1?"
Right there and then, I knew that the Uncle was totting me for money for no returns.
My daft reply was quick and swift. "No." And i promptly walked away.
Why did this little encounter raised such a big issue for me? Personally, I'm neither rich nor poor. I have able legs and hands and so does that uncle from the outlook of things. From the way he dresses, he looks financially capable enough to get a job instead of getting spare change from me. If you want dough, you have to go make your own dough, be it picking up empty aluminium cans or working as a security guard. I know that i'm being very evil by criticising people who are old enough to be my dad or even my grandparents but you see, my parents much less my grandparents worked until they retired. Get a job, increase Singapore's unemployement rate, boost our economy and stop irritating me at bus stops.
Another reason why I want to mention Beggars for today's topic was because of how cunning they are. Like the uncle who approached me, he tried to downplay the encounter by luring me to a helpful state so that I can assist a financially-strapped uncle like him. Recent newspapers reports mentioned that there were some beggars whom acted disabled when they are not. They are depiscable I tell you and hence my stingy mannerisms in donating money to these sit-there-&-play-act-people.
Remembering one scenario of a blind beggar who went to McDonalds and this lady waved a French fry in his face and his "eyes" followed the motion of the fry. But the beggar refused and insisted for more. This scenario disgusts me mainly because of how lazy and knaving that they are. That is why I never donate to a charitable cause and even if i do, I would do it in VERY reluctant circumstances.
You see, I want to know where my contribution goes to. Even though my maegre donation of $2 does not make much impact in the organization, I would at least deserve to know where I put my hard-saved money to. That is why you don't see me calling those 1900-charity lines or dropping in coins at donation cans because you see, who the hell knows where the money goes? My bet is a majority of the money is spent on the renovation of zen-like gardens in old folks home which I deem is unnceccesary or to the pockets of the Director of the non-profit organization. In either case, I would rather give my money to that uncle because at least I know he will use the money to buy Tiger beer that will help increase Asian Breweries share price and boost the economy.
If you think I'm mean. So be it. These are my exact thoughts. If i ever end up as a beggar, there are a few options that I would choose. A 17th floor window ledge to jump from or becoming a security guard. Either case, I would choose the latter because I know I will be killed by my colleague anyway by earning money AND getting insurance for my leftover family members.
- Benjamin
Stumbled onto a funny site. It will definently spice up your Mondays.
The story of the Turtle & the Hare
The Matrix: Chinese Heinenken
Italians & Europeans: The Difference
Well, after those laffs. I'm sure you will be ready for your daily dosage of sacrasm and downright obscene opinions by moi.
Did nothing much today except working on work. What else?
The topic for the day is : Beggars
I was coming home from watching the Matrix Revolutions and as I stepped off the escalator to the bus stop, a man aged 40 plus approached me.
40+ man: "Ah di ah, what time is it now?"
Me being the ever sincere and helpful person, gave him the time.
Me: "10.30pm"
40+ man: "Ah di ah, you got change anot for $1?"
Right there and then, I knew that the Uncle was totting me for money for no returns.
My daft reply was quick and swift. "No." And i promptly walked away.
Why did this little encounter raised such a big issue for me? Personally, I'm neither rich nor poor. I have able legs and hands and so does that uncle from the outlook of things. From the way he dresses, he looks financially capable enough to get a job instead of getting spare change from me. If you want dough, you have to go make your own dough, be it picking up empty aluminium cans or working as a security guard. I know that i'm being very evil by criticising people who are old enough to be my dad or even my grandparents but you see, my parents much less my grandparents worked until they retired. Get a job, increase Singapore's unemployement rate, boost our economy and stop irritating me at bus stops.
Another reason why I want to mention Beggars for today's topic was because of how cunning they are. Like the uncle who approached me, he tried to downplay the encounter by luring me to a helpful state so that I can assist a financially-strapped uncle like him. Recent newspapers reports mentioned that there were some beggars whom acted disabled when they are not. They are depiscable I tell you and hence my stingy mannerisms in donating money to these sit-there-&-play-act-people.
Remembering one scenario of a blind beggar who went to McDonalds and this lady waved a French fry in his face and his "eyes" followed the motion of the fry. But the beggar refused and insisted for more. This scenario disgusts me mainly because of how lazy and knaving that they are. That is why I never donate to a charitable cause and even if i do, I would do it in VERY reluctant circumstances.
You see, I want to know where my contribution goes to. Even though my maegre donation of $2 does not make much impact in the organization, I would at least deserve to know where I put my hard-saved money to. That is why you don't see me calling those 1900-charity lines or dropping in coins at donation cans because you see, who the hell knows where the money goes? My bet is a majority of the money is spent on the renovation of zen-like gardens in old folks home which I deem is unnceccesary or to the pockets of the Director of the non-profit organization. In either case, I would rather give my money to that uncle because at least I know he will use the money to buy Tiger beer that will help increase Asian Breweries share price and boost the economy.
If you think I'm mean. So be it. These are my exact thoughts. If i ever end up as a beggar, there are a few options that I would choose. A 17th floor window ledge to jump from or becoming a security guard. Either case, I would choose the latter because I know I will be killed by my colleague anyway by earning money AND getting insurance for my leftover family members.
- Benjamin
Stupdendous
Back from the theatre. My personal comment about Matrix Revolutions can be described in one word.
Stupdendous.
The adrenalin from the movie was so overwhelming that even now, after 2 hours later, it is still ringing in my head. Not because I have a headache, but it was the most mind-boggling yet fantastically crafted movie by the Wachowski brothers!! Well, stupid people would be wondering what is all the conversation between the Oracle and the rest of the members. You see, the story is complex to the extent that even a university graduate takes some time to grasp that complexity and churn it out to an understandable storyline. Not that i'm an intellectual but because I read up a bit before going to the movies. I did my homework. =P
In short, Neo, Morpheus, Trinity and Agent Smith are programmes. The whole matrix is an equation that has a final result. The Oracle and the Architect are nemesis. They are the mathematicians in this jumblinhg of equations. In this equation, there are anomalies. Anomalies are people who isn't well programmed and doesn't fit into the equation. The Oracle is programmed to get people out of the matrix whereas the Architect is to complete the equation. In other words, the Oracle is making the equation impossible for the Architect to solve. Agent Smith is programmed to get rid of Neo. Neo is programmed to save planet Zion and free the people trapped in the Matrix. Trinity is programmed to assist Neo in whatever he does. Morpheus is programmed to find the Neo. Not to give a spoiler here but all in all, the ending, the screenplay and action was fantastic. Go watch it.
- Benjamin
Back from the theatre. My personal comment about Matrix Revolutions can be described in one word.
Stupdendous.
The adrenalin from the movie was so overwhelming that even now, after 2 hours later, it is still ringing in my head. Not because I have a headache, but it was the most mind-boggling yet fantastically crafted movie by the Wachowski brothers!! Well, stupid people would be wondering what is all the conversation between the Oracle and the rest of the members. You see, the story is complex to the extent that even a university graduate takes some time to grasp that complexity and churn it out to an understandable storyline. Not that i'm an intellectual but because I read up a bit before going to the movies. I did my homework. =P
In short, Neo, Morpheus, Trinity and Agent Smith are programmes. The whole matrix is an equation that has a final result. The Oracle and the Architect are nemesis. They are the mathematicians in this jumblinhg of equations. In this equation, there are anomalies. Anomalies are people who isn't well programmed and doesn't fit into the equation. The Oracle is programmed to get people out of the matrix whereas the Architect is to complete the equation. In other words, the Oracle is making the equation impossible for the Architect to solve. Agent Smith is programmed to get rid of Neo. Neo is programmed to save planet Zion and free the people trapped in the Matrix. Trinity is programmed to assist Neo in whatever he does. Morpheus is programmed to find the Neo. Not to give a spoiler here but all in all, the ending, the screenplay and action was fantastic. Go watch it.
- Benjamin
Sunday, November 09, 2003
Schizophrenia
Everyone has a personality. Some people even might have split personalities. Your blog can reflect your real life personality or you are leading a two-faced life. For me, my blog really reflects what I really feel and what my fears, personality or feelings at a certain point of time. So, I went to do the inevitable to really test myself. I did a Blog personality test.
For those interested, this is the link. Bloginality
These were my results:
As an ENTJ, you are Extroverted, intuitive, Thinking, Judging.
This makes your primary focus on Extroverted Thinking with an Introverted Intution.
This is defined as a NT personality, which is part of Carl Jung's Rational (Knowledge Seeking) type, and more specifically the Field Marshal or Executive.
Because of your take-charge tendancies, you might be likely to organize a group weblog. You get along best with people who see things the same way as you, and so some of your favorite blogs to read may be people with a Thinking part to their personality type. You are very dynamic, and may intimidate people with a less enthused spirit
Well, if i ever lead a group weblog, I would willingly set up a counter outside my blogspace and take in volunteers to each stab me in the chest with whatever that pleases them.
However, the initial analysis is accuarate. I'm extroverted, to a certain extent in my blog because I have been nonsensical and somewhat exaggereted here and there. Thus, I twist some facts here and there but for my faithful blog readers (which I can count with the fingers on my one hand), but I can assure you that all that have been typed here has been essentially true.
My introverted intution also accounts for the fact that I think alot. Although not as deep as finding out the meaning of true love or Xie Shaoguang's sexuality but still, I scrape the surface alot on social issues of worthy interest and with an certain amount of intellect. (Of which you can argue, Ben has always been bigoted in his way of thinking and what does he ever use his puny brain matter to ever think?)
Gotta go catch the movie Matrix: Revolutions. Well all that hype and advertisements better be worth my time. I'm not a movie critic but a money critic as I would evaluate cost depreciation that is dependent on the entertainment equity that a movie/TV show/radio proggramme will provide. My thoughts later ....
Everyone has a personality. Some people even might have split personalities. Your blog can reflect your real life personality or you are leading a two-faced life. For me, my blog really reflects what I really feel and what my fears, personality or feelings at a certain point of time. So, I went to do the inevitable to really test myself. I did a Blog personality test.
For those interested, this is the link. Bloginality
These were my results:
As an ENTJ, you are Extroverted, intuitive, Thinking, Judging.
This makes your primary focus on Extroverted Thinking with an Introverted Intution.
This is defined as a NT personality, which is part of Carl Jung's Rational (Knowledge Seeking) type, and more specifically the Field Marshal or Executive.
Because of your take-charge tendancies, you might be likely to organize a group weblog. You get along best with people who see things the same way as you, and so some of your favorite blogs to read may be people with a Thinking part to their personality type. You are very dynamic, and may intimidate people with a less enthused spirit
Well, if i ever lead a group weblog, I would willingly set up a counter outside my blogspace and take in volunteers to each stab me in the chest with whatever that pleases them.
However, the initial analysis is accuarate. I'm extroverted, to a certain extent in my blog because I have been nonsensical and somewhat exaggereted here and there. Thus, I twist some facts here and there but for my faithful blog readers (which I can count with the fingers on my one hand), but I can assure you that all that have been typed here has been essentially true.
My introverted intution also accounts for the fact that I think alot. Although not as deep as finding out the meaning of true love or Xie Shaoguang's sexuality but still, I scrape the surface alot on social issues of worthy interest and with an certain amount of intellect. (Of which you can argue, Ben has always been bigoted in his way of thinking and what does he ever use his puny brain matter to ever think?)
Gotta go catch the movie Matrix: Revolutions. Well all that hype and advertisements better be worth my time. I'm not a movie critic but a money critic as I would evaluate cost depreciation that is dependent on the entertainment equity that a movie/TV show/radio proggramme will provide. My thoughts later ....
Saturday, November 08, 2003
Brainwave
It's Saturday afternoon and I feel so productive = )
Well, this is because of my various accomplishments that I achieved through searching the net and yes, as you have seen, I have changed the outlook of my blog. Sparse and clean look. Added a comments box on the right >>>, and I have also learned how to insert a picture !!!
Just this 12 noon, I was watching myself on the reality show I joined, called Brainwave. The concept of the show was as confusing and crazy as the curly hair found on my leg but as long as I had a chance to challenge myself creatively, I couldn't care how I looked like. I'm very self-critical of myself and when people go on tv, they would want to look good, duh ! The rest of the gals on my team dressed up very neatly and me, I couldnt care less with my hairdo and I looked out of sorts.
Suprisingly, Wendy on the tagboard there says I look good on TV. (Btw, you're not fat). All I could criticise myself was on my crooked front tooth that was obscenely reminding me to visit the dentist. Well, if i put on braces, I'm sure that my mum will use me as a multi-purpose kitchen appliance for grating, cutting and chopping. I blame my childhood for all those sweets that attacked my teeth and hence now, my craving for sweets has died down to the tinge of detest. Only the occasional sweets catch my interest.
Back to the show, Stupid Channel i did not put up a trailer for week 3 show. Grrr. So what if you have a revamp, i just want my weekly dosage of "Brainwave" as stupid as my protruding tooth looks on your broadcasting channel. Also, my hair at the Sentosa event on that day was out of place too because I did not bring gel on that day. I look like Scruffy the Sentosa sotong.
My father who was watching the show along with me kept commenting how stupid and useless my team was. I know it sounds cliche but you never know unless you really tried it yourself and then see how you react in it. My team made mistakes here and there, tactical and personal, but it is all over now. We can only throw that all behind and look forward at the path ahead and just backstab one another when we each have an arm around the other. What an interesting thought.
Here is a picture of me in the top row, next to me on the left is Tiffany and on the right, Eva.The other team is also from SP, called Zenith. From L to R, it's Jo, Ivan and Yan Wen. Anyway, I wrote this post so I could at least put a picture here.
Bite Me. = P
- Benjamin
P.S. Today's post of the day has already been written below.
It's Saturday afternoon and I feel so productive = )
Well, this is because of my various accomplishments that I achieved through searching the net and yes, as you have seen, I have changed the outlook of my blog. Sparse and clean look. Added a comments box on the right >>>, and I have also learned how to insert a picture !!!
Just this 12 noon, I was watching myself on the reality show I joined, called Brainwave. The concept of the show was as confusing and crazy as the curly hair found on my leg but as long as I had a chance to challenge myself creatively, I couldn't care how I looked like. I'm very self-critical of myself and when people go on tv, they would want to look good, duh ! The rest of the gals on my team dressed up very neatly and me, I couldnt care less with my hairdo and I looked out of sorts.
Suprisingly, Wendy on the tagboard there says I look good on TV. (Btw, you're not fat). All I could criticise myself was on my crooked front tooth that was obscenely reminding me to visit the dentist. Well, if i put on braces, I'm sure that my mum will use me as a multi-purpose kitchen appliance for grating, cutting and chopping. I blame my childhood for all those sweets that attacked my teeth and hence now, my craving for sweets has died down to the tinge of detest. Only the occasional sweets catch my interest.
Back to the show, Stupid Channel i did not put up a trailer for week 3 show. Grrr. So what if you have a revamp, i just want my weekly dosage of "Brainwave" as stupid as my protruding tooth looks on your broadcasting channel. Also, my hair at the Sentosa event on that day was out of place too because I did not bring gel on that day. I look like Scruffy the Sentosa sotong.
My father who was watching the show along with me kept commenting how stupid and useless my team was. I know it sounds cliche but you never know unless you really tried it yourself and then see how you react in it. My team made mistakes here and there, tactical and personal, but it is all over now. We can only throw that all behind and look forward at the path ahead and just backstab one another when we each have an arm around the other. What an interesting thought.
Here is a picture of me in the top row, next to me on the left is Tiffany and on the right, Eva.The other team is also from SP, called Zenith. From L to R, it's Jo, Ivan and Yan Wen. Anyway, I wrote this post so I could at least put a picture here.
Bite Me. = P
- Benjamin
P.S. Today's post of the day has already been written below.
Drive
I have shit loads to do.
Have to do up a powerpoint but I prefer blogging my points here. It's barely 20 minutes from my last post but who cares? It's saturday. So, I can blog now instead of later.
What happened in the last 30 minutes? Nothing much can be expected from a typical Singaporean. Lying listlessly on my bed typing this blog, this got me thinking. 30 minutes just passed in my life, how will the next 30 minutes be? Your answer is likely to be improve on the last 30 minutes of course. The Main Question is: If you kept improving in life, you reached nirvana and achieved self-actualization, then whats next ? If you happen to be such a person, that means you just disproved the highly acclaimed Maslow's hierachy of needs. You form the eighth and highest level of the pyramid. I shall aptly name it, the need of no needs.
When will anyone reach that level ? For me, it would have to be having a group of genuine friends, have a trillion dollars safely in my Swiss bank account, own my own airline and castle. Additionally, I would have a harem to boast of and I lay by the Olympic pool side that I owned doing practically nothing, looking sexy with my fats bulging out of my little speedo. That will be the day when I have climbed the 8th level of the pyramid. Sadly, few have reached those heights and even so, they would have turned pyschotic or plain moronic by now.
If only wishes came true. Then, I would ignore my need for love, need for security and the need for acceptance by taking an escalator to the highest possible level, by stepping/using all those that i know of to attain that level. As unethical and despiscable it might be, I will be pyschotic enough to try that now and then. Who honestly tells me that they don't want a harem ?
Topic of the day : Learning to Drive
Poor people are typical EZ-link card users to get around. Aka me. And those smart buggers like me who dont waste money to buy a piece of useless paper that decompose after 10 years. Aka COE. I can't drive because I am too busy to take proper driving lessons that cost a bomb where I could instead, teach my driving instructor a lesson by placing a bomb in his car.
I took 5 driving lessons before I stopped. One, I was busy with school projects. Two, I was busy making mistakes learning how to drive on the road while the instructor slept. Mr Lim, my driving instructor was one of a kind. He has been teaching driving lessons to students for 20 odd years. His experience snored louder than words.
One day, I was brought to a car park beside Bedok Stadium to do roundabouts. This was to practice my gear shifting and my brake. Most of my driving lessons are held in the afternoon and you all know how afternoons are in the summer. The bright sun gleaming while those who enjoyed air-con, slept soundly. Which was what my instructor did exactly for 30 minutes. All i could do was to keep my eyes on the roundabout and pray that I don't hit a vertically parked coach whose driver was also enjoying his afternoon nap in the comforts of his driving seat.
On the other hand, I was most uncomfortable that I paid $33 for my lesson where all my instructor was drool. If I wanted that to happen, I would be more charitable and donate that amount to SPCA and hug a dog to sleep. At least i get to be with a cuddly creature than a dickless driving instructor.
At least now you know why a country so small has so many accidents a year and public funds are wasted notifying drivers how to drive safely. The government should channel the funds to purchase Viagra for driving instructors, to make them awake all day, all night.
- Benjamin
I have shit loads to do.
Have to do up a powerpoint but I prefer blogging my points here. It's barely 20 minutes from my last post but who cares? It's saturday. So, I can blog now instead of later.
What happened in the last 30 minutes? Nothing much can be expected from a typical Singaporean. Lying listlessly on my bed typing this blog, this got me thinking. 30 minutes just passed in my life, how will the next 30 minutes be? Your answer is likely to be improve on the last 30 minutes of course. The Main Question is: If you kept improving in life, you reached nirvana and achieved self-actualization, then whats next ? If you happen to be such a person, that means you just disproved the highly acclaimed Maslow's hierachy of needs. You form the eighth and highest level of the pyramid. I shall aptly name it, the need of no needs.
When will anyone reach that level ? For me, it would have to be having a group of genuine friends, have a trillion dollars safely in my Swiss bank account, own my own airline and castle. Additionally, I would have a harem to boast of and I lay by the Olympic pool side that I owned doing practically nothing, looking sexy with my fats bulging out of my little speedo. That will be the day when I have climbed the 8th level of the pyramid. Sadly, few have reached those heights and even so, they would have turned pyschotic or plain moronic by now.
If only wishes came true. Then, I would ignore my need for love, need for security and the need for acceptance by taking an escalator to the highest possible level, by stepping/using all those that i know of to attain that level. As unethical and despiscable it might be, I will be pyschotic enough to try that now and then. Who honestly tells me that they don't want a harem ?
Topic of the day : Learning to Drive
Poor people are typical EZ-link card users to get around. Aka me. And those smart buggers like me who dont waste money to buy a piece of useless paper that decompose after 10 years. Aka COE. I can't drive because I am too busy to take proper driving lessons that cost a bomb where I could instead, teach my driving instructor a lesson by placing a bomb in his car.
I took 5 driving lessons before I stopped. One, I was busy with school projects. Two, I was busy making mistakes learning how to drive on the road while the instructor slept. Mr Lim, my driving instructor was one of a kind. He has been teaching driving lessons to students for 20 odd years. His experience snored louder than words.
One day, I was brought to a car park beside Bedok Stadium to do roundabouts. This was to practice my gear shifting and my brake. Most of my driving lessons are held in the afternoon and you all know how afternoons are in the summer. The bright sun gleaming while those who enjoyed air-con, slept soundly. Which was what my instructor did exactly for 30 minutes. All i could do was to keep my eyes on the roundabout and pray that I don't hit a vertically parked coach whose driver was also enjoying his afternoon nap in the comforts of his driving seat.
On the other hand, I was most uncomfortable that I paid $33 for my lesson where all my instructor was drool. If I wanted that to happen, I would be more charitable and donate that amount to SPCA and hug a dog to sleep. At least i get to be with a cuddly creature than a dickless driving instructor.
At least now you know why a country so small has so many accidents a year and public funds are wasted notifying drivers how to drive safely. The government should channel the funds to purchase Viagra for driving instructors, to make them awake all day, all night.
- Benjamin
Friday, November 07, 2003
Improvement
Hahaha,
I got loads of comments about my shortest post ever.
How to improve my blog 101. Really appreciate the comments from everyone. If only I can add a comments box, make my paragraphs shorter and add in pictures for an overall visual effect. Hmmmm..... lets see what a hmtl-iliterate bastard can do.
Going back to Thursday, it was a filming day as usual. Started from the airport. So, i was filming the flipboard that displayed all the departing flights and a policeman from CAAS approached me. (Why me? do i look like a terrorist to people?)
Policeman: Where are you from? (Policeman's favourite question)
Me: Singapore Polytechnic (Starts packing up the camera)
I'm really worried that he would confiscate my tape at this point of time.
Policeman: You got letter from CAAS to film here?
Me: Um.... no.
Policeman: Then, you cannot film here. (Policeman's favourite shoo-away cameraman line).
You cannot film the check-in counters.
Me: (Courage creeps in) But I only film the board leh.
Policeman: Oh. Then it's okay. (Walks away grudgingly that his authority shrunk with his manhood)
Woo Hoo!!! My triumphant victory over a policeman. As lame as it is, I felt smug because I simply stated my case. And won.
But no, that wasn't the end of the story. Gung-Ho Qian Ling was so daring, that she pretended to film the electronic television that displayed all the flights and she "conveniently" shot the check counters. I'm a coward so what. At least I admit that I'm one. Remember my fears, look at last 2 posts.
Besides travelling all around terminal 2, we went to explore the Orchard area. It seems God has some kind of hatred towards camerapeople and it started to rain, and then stop, and rain again. There goes our outdoor footage. Sulky and grey skies for a colourful cheerful course video.
Besides us camerapeople, we spotted other camera crew too. Not the tourist but people from Channel U and Channel 5. Glenn and Rod was hosting their sports show outside Heeren, Gung Ho Qian Ling went to film them filming and guess what, Glenn, Rod and the whole Channel 5 camera crew waved at her. Never have I seen a scarlet red face in my life before. The channel U crew was less welcoming, they looked like a cocky bunch of crew members, Darren Lim was with them and his voice sounded very macho and deep. Like a booming thunder that resonated with the weather.
That was my entire day. After which my 2 day exertions led to my Sleeping Beauty stance.
Morals of today's post: Tourists Part 2
As I was saying from the last blog entry, Singaporean tourists are so one kind. They are very slanted to their views and use a self-referencing criterion to measure what they encounter overseas. Let me illustrate more examples.
When you're overseas, you always experience the different culture there. But for Singaporeans, they simply refuse to acknowledge that horrible fact that overseas countries cannot keep up to the standard of Singapore class.
A great example would be food. Singaporeans sterotype other countries' food. If they see that students go to England or the United States to study, they would then say "Everyday eat bread, eat french fries. Buay sian ah !". So when Singaporeans go overseas, on the first few days, they will eat Fish and Chips if they go to USA, Australia or England, after that, they start whining and say: " Why so hard to find chicken rice or mee rebus stall huh?"
First things first, if you're overseas, of course you have to blend into the culture and eat their assortment of food there. Don't expect to bring the Singaporean context overseas because that will never happen. So, stop complaining and stop whining. If you want to eat Singaporean food overseas, then you will even complain more. Reason being that rice and noodles would cost more there and then your stingy wallet would slap your hand to make a purchase as much as your unadaptable stomach growls for rice carbohydrate.
Another highlight worth noting is Chilli. Singaporeans die die must eat chilli no matter where they go. Classic example is my mum. Chilli is a spice that will help enhance the taste of your food. That's rubbish to me. I don't prefer a spicy lingering taste in my mouth destroying the crispy chicken skin or the chewy french fries. Chilli, however is the lifeblood and the conversation topic of every meal overseas to my mum. Out of nowhere that we are having a seafood cuisine, she will pop the question. "Can ask the waiter to bring chili sauce for me?" I had to restraint my fork-holding-hand everytime we had a meal together.
Then, if it is not the chilli, what would make an EVEN greater topic would be the PRICE of chilli. In the United states, you would have to pay like S$0.50 for a small cup of chilli sauce at McDonalds and about S$0.30 at McDonalds Australia. So, everytime she approach the counter staff, this normally happens. It's based on a true encounter.
Mom: "Can I have some chilli sauce?"
McDonalds staff: "What sauce, mam?" (Right eyebrow twitched slightly at the request)
Mom: "Chi-li sauce lah."
McDonalds staff: "I'm sorry mam, we don't have such a sauce." (rolling eyes)
Mom: "Aiya, you know the small small one. Red colour and then this long." (Uses her two fingers to measure an average chili)
McDonalds staff: "Oh THAT! We have it. That would cost A30 cents please."
Mom: "Aiyo, sure anot, Singapore give free one leh."
McDonalds staff: .....
Well, you cannot expect Australia to be like Singapore. Or else, why even bother going overseas when you might as well stay home.
- Benjamin
Hahaha,
I got loads of comments about my shortest post ever.
How to improve my blog 101. Really appreciate the comments from everyone. If only I can add a comments box, make my paragraphs shorter and add in pictures for an overall visual effect. Hmmmm..... lets see what a hmtl-iliterate bastard can do.
Going back to Thursday, it was a filming day as usual. Started from the airport. So, i was filming the flipboard that displayed all the departing flights and a policeman from CAAS approached me. (Why me? do i look like a terrorist to people?)
Policeman: Where are you from? (Policeman's favourite question)
Me: Singapore Polytechnic (Starts packing up the camera)
I'm really worried that he would confiscate my tape at this point of time.
Policeman: You got letter from CAAS to film here?
Me: Um.... no.
Policeman: Then, you cannot film here. (Policeman's favourite shoo-away cameraman line).
You cannot film the check-in counters.
Me: (Courage creeps in) But I only film the board leh.
Policeman: Oh. Then it's okay. (Walks away grudgingly that his authority shrunk with his manhood)
Woo Hoo!!! My triumphant victory over a policeman. As lame as it is, I felt smug because I simply stated my case. And won.
But no, that wasn't the end of the story. Gung-Ho Qian Ling was so daring, that she pretended to film the electronic television that displayed all the flights and she "conveniently" shot the check counters. I'm a coward so what. At least I admit that I'm one. Remember my fears, look at last 2 posts.
Besides travelling all around terminal 2, we went to explore the Orchard area. It seems God has some kind of hatred towards camerapeople and it started to rain, and then stop, and rain again. There goes our outdoor footage. Sulky and grey skies for a colourful cheerful course video.
Besides us camerapeople, we spotted other camera crew too. Not the tourist but people from Channel U and Channel 5. Glenn and Rod was hosting their sports show outside Heeren, Gung Ho Qian Ling went to film them filming and guess what, Glenn, Rod and the whole Channel 5 camera crew waved at her. Never have I seen a scarlet red face in my life before. The channel U crew was less welcoming, they looked like a cocky bunch of crew members, Darren Lim was with them and his voice sounded very macho and deep. Like a booming thunder that resonated with the weather.
That was my entire day. After which my 2 day exertions led to my Sleeping Beauty stance.
Morals of today's post: Tourists Part 2
As I was saying from the last blog entry, Singaporean tourists are so one kind. They are very slanted to their views and use a self-referencing criterion to measure what they encounter overseas. Let me illustrate more examples.
When you're overseas, you always experience the different culture there. But for Singaporeans, they simply refuse to acknowledge that horrible fact that overseas countries cannot keep up to the standard of Singapore class.
A great example would be food. Singaporeans sterotype other countries' food. If they see that students go to England or the United States to study, they would then say "Everyday eat bread, eat french fries. Buay sian ah !". So when Singaporeans go overseas, on the first few days, they will eat Fish and Chips if they go to USA, Australia or England, after that, they start whining and say: " Why so hard to find chicken rice or mee rebus stall huh?"
First things first, if you're overseas, of course you have to blend into the culture and eat their assortment of food there. Don't expect to bring the Singaporean context overseas because that will never happen. So, stop complaining and stop whining. If you want to eat Singaporean food overseas, then you will even complain more. Reason being that rice and noodles would cost more there and then your stingy wallet would slap your hand to make a purchase as much as your unadaptable stomach growls for rice carbohydrate.
Another highlight worth noting is Chilli. Singaporeans die die must eat chilli no matter where they go. Classic example is my mum. Chilli is a spice that will help enhance the taste of your food. That's rubbish to me. I don't prefer a spicy lingering taste in my mouth destroying the crispy chicken skin or the chewy french fries. Chilli, however is the lifeblood and the conversation topic of every meal overseas to my mum. Out of nowhere that we are having a seafood cuisine, she will pop the question. "Can ask the waiter to bring chili sauce for me?" I had to restraint my fork-holding-hand everytime we had a meal together.
Then, if it is not the chilli, what would make an EVEN greater topic would be the PRICE of chilli. In the United states, you would have to pay like S$0.50 for a small cup of chilli sauce at McDonalds and about S$0.30 at McDonalds Australia. So, everytime she approach the counter staff, this normally happens. It's based on a true encounter.
Mom: "Can I have some chilli sauce?"
McDonalds staff: "What sauce, mam?" (Right eyebrow twitched slightly at the request)
Mom: "Chi-li sauce lah."
McDonalds staff: "I'm sorry mam, we don't have such a sauce." (rolling eyes)
Mom: "Aiya, you know the small small one. Red colour and then this long." (Uses her two fingers to measure an average chili)
McDonalds staff: "Oh THAT! We have it. That would cost A30 cents please."
Mom: "Aiyo, sure anot, Singapore give free one leh."
McDonalds staff: .....
Well, you cannot expect Australia to be like Singapore. Or else, why even bother going overseas when you might as well stay home.
- Benjamin
Tired
Too tired to blog today.
My exertions running around town was too tiring. Will blog when I wake up.
Note: I have received one comment about this blog. That critic said it was b-o-r-i-n-g.
If only I can find some ways to include sex, lies and blog-tape.
Falling asleep. And the thought of boring people never occured to me. I must be getting retarded soon.
Well, I have to reach adulthood somehow.
- Benjamin
Too tired to blog today.
My exertions running around town was too tiring. Will blog when I wake up.
Note: I have received one comment about this blog. That critic said it was b-o-r-i-n-g.
If only I can find some ways to include sex, lies and blog-tape.
Falling asleep. And the thought of boring people never occured to me. I must be getting retarded soon.
Well, I have to reach adulthood somehow.
- Benjamin
Wednesday, November 05, 2003
Tourists
What a day, what a day.
If only I wore a hawaiian shirt and brought along a camera & sunglasses, I would have belong to an elite crowd of money spenders. Nope, not the stupid looking Upper-upper class but a tourist.
Travelled the entire of Singapore south to film certain scenes for a video. Wow, it was a leg-breaking, back-numbing, finger-cracking task. Carrying around a light camera and a tripod, that was the easiest task. Overcoming my fears was the worst. Let me lay out the juicy details for ya.
Everyone has fears, including me. Two of them are innate to my horoscope sign of Virgos/Virgoes. I never like to admit that i am wrong and I never want to be in the wrong. Therefore, if I never want to be in the wrong side of things, I don't do the wrong things in life. That's me, I never try to do wrong things. If i don't know how to do certain objectives/task , I'll clarify my objectives/task at hand and go out and do it. This is where my fear comes in. I have a fear for authority and approaching strangers.
Yes. And today, I faced my fears. Lugging a video camera around, you had to take certain shots and for those shots to be steady, you had to be SO conspicuous that people will be looking at you and say "Wah, got people filming leh, go see." And then, a crowd ensues. Crowd control officers arrive and tries to control the 3,000 people encircling the camera crew of 3 but to no avail, the second landing floor collapses, leading to the collapse of Raffles City, like 911. Since Raffles city was one of the tallest hotel in the world, it collapses over Suntec City and the other 4 towers collapses over to Marina Meritus Mandarin and Conrad Hotel. In the end, the only building not destroyed in City Hall is the hideous durains that even falling towers want to avoid its spikes. Of course, that didn't happen. But, passer-bys take a glance and look forward, thinking what "extras" we are and what the hell are we doing here.
Qian Ling, Suhanah and I was part of that filming crew that the public swore, avoided and spitted at. Having a video camera as a tourist is perfectly normal. Having a video camera as a student is like the SARS outbreak. Once the red light is out on the DV cam that you're recording, people turn left like Gigi, turn right like Takeshi to avoid being captured in the camera. For those people out there, give us students a break. You have an occupation going shopping in the day and spitting at strangers, can you spare some thoughts to students who just need a barely 5 second shot of you. Nobody is going to recognise you or that hideous mole on you double chin. Grrrrr.
Digressing again. Back to my fears. As I was saying, I was filming around City Hall area and we need some shots of store fronts. Usually, we need to get authorization from the management for a 5 second shot of their outlook. Usually it takes 5 months to go through their line of management before it is processed, just for a measely 5 second shot because it seems in the 5 seconds, the world will crumble if we STUDENTS took a BAD shot of the shop front. APPARENTLY, they did not know that practice takes perfect and if EVERYONE took bad shots of everything, then why is there the invention of TELEVISION. Well, we approached, we asked nicely, we were on our knees, we slipped a bribe in that handshake. But the answer was simply NO, 5 seconds would cause the investors of the shop to withdraw their stocks from it. This happened at the 37 degree shops along CityLink Mall. I am not saying that the retail assitants were mean, they were simply not flexible.
There were security guards patrolling EVERYWHERE we go. Or worse, hidden cameras that heighten my own fears. So, to avoid dissapointment in everything that we shoot, we adopt a simple approach. Shoot and run. Now, as cowardly as it seem as it may be, This method has been proven effective as they only chase us away when we became an eyesore or that we stopped customers from entering the store (which will affect the investors dividends apparently....). So, the brave Qian Ling (heads up to her), did all the shooting, and we just ran along. She daringly went into MPH, HMV and even to Equinox to film. I was counting down when were they going to release the dogs on us.
Of course we survived the gangly imaginary dog attack, or else i wouldnt be here. I am not brave enough to do such a thing on treading dangerous grounds to film certain shots. My fear of breaching authorization or doing wrong things is simply too overwhelming for me. In the film industry, you need to be thick-skinned. I am just too slim to join the industry then. This fear, which I tried effortlessly today to overcome was almost broken. Until an incident at 3.40 pm took place.
I was filming a moving FEDEX van. It whizzed too fast. I found up ending up 50m away from the rest and next to the Treasury building. I turned around. And took some shots of the Treasury building name in the name for this project. Barely 15 seconds past and a fierce looking Malay policeman came running out, with his hand next to his baton.
Policeman: "Oei, cannot film here. Government building."
Me: (Starts to shiver)"Sorry."
Police: "Where you from?"
Me: (Legs trembling) "Si-Si-Sing-apore Polytechinc"
Police: (Sees Suhanah & Qian Ling coming) "Your crew huh?"
Me: "Yah." (Mouth starts foaming)
Police: "Cannot film here." (Waves the baton in front of my face)
Me: (Convulsions coming, faints)
I didn't faint. I skampered out of there like a rat. This was my first outdoor shooting and the brush of the law was less than welcomed but it made its entry like a Christopher laughter out of nowhere in lecture hall. My fear of approaching strangers or being in the wrong will be part of my personality. Forever. I will never be a surveryor, I will never approach gals in a club, I will never get slammed by a policeman again for a school project. It is a weakness of me. That is why I don't think I will be an insurance agent or a housing agent. If I end up as one, go buy a baton and whack me on my head.
The post of the day: Tourists
Being a tourist and seeing tourist is a totally different concept. Singaporeans loves to travel. Singaporeans also loves to criticise. We Singaporeans have a bad habit. A sight of white skin people and the immediate Singlish of "ang moh" comes out. Sterotypical ? Yes, but it is ironic that we ang moh people in a multi-cultural society.
Singapore makes a great deal of income from Tourism. One thing about Singapore is that we are not even great. A cosmopolitian city we are, but if you want to cosmo, go visit your country's capital. I rather you visit the moon for more interesting spots than in Singapore. We have absolutely nothing. Nothing credible. Zoo - everyone has one. Sentosa - Batam is quite nearby. Esplanade - Geylang or Malaysia also can find. Entertainment - Geylang, Thailand or Malaysia also can find. Shopping - Hong Kong not good enough for you? So much money, give to IMF lah. In summary, Singapore is only good for business, food and manpower. Amazing what the Singaporean Tourism Board has doing to make a useless island to an ideal destination spot to splurge your wealth when we have nothing spectacular to offer you. So, to visitors of Singapore out there, come here for the food. We have a cuisine that will make your bowels move. Remember to visit all the stalls that are rated "D' or even better "E". They are the best here in Singapore. If you want leisure, you can find some holes in some country clubs on a land-scarce island or you can find even lesser holes in Geylang on a baby-scarce island.
Now, how about Singaporeans as tourists? Wow,, we are one of a kind. The moment some stuff is cheap, you scream like the kopitiam auntie to your relatives:" OEI, Singapore sell $2, here only sell $0.20. MUST BUY." This usually can be heard in Johor Bahru. Your parents or relatives are such typical tourists. Do you have a lifetime supply of JB keropok or kaya in your kitchen cabinets?
Another personality trait that Singaporeans exude overseas is also similar to the one mentioned above. The moment something is expensive, you scream like the kopitiam auntie to your relatives: "OEI, don't buy hor, Singapore sell $2, here see $2.01. SO expensive. Go home then buy." This usually can be heard in the United States, Japan, Europe and Australiasia. Singaporeans are frugal shoppers. Cheap is good. Good means everyone must buy. Everyone must buy means must buy more than everyone before everyone buys it. I fully empathises with your pain with the loaded cabinets of keropoks that you have.
There are more interesting habits but will touch on it later. Singaporeans are show-offs so no matter where they go, they must bring evidence of their triumphant overseas. The most common type would be photos. This is proven when my family when overseas, my mother kept pestering me to develop them. I did not heed her instructions for 3 days. It was hell at home until I relented. Even then, she made me went back to the shop again to redevelop them. My mom would bring photos to everyone to show when she went. The flight was leaving from Brisbane in 4 hrs, she asked my Dad to take 18 photos of her in the Hotel. Ummm .... it shows u with a pot of flowers overseas. If she loved that, I shall book a hotel in any Singaporean 4-star hotel and make sure they have a reception area filled with loads of flowers. This behaviour is pretty lame.
Besides photos, there are magnets, mugs, teddy bears, key chains. In other words, souvneirs. In my words, show-off-viers (showoffviers). You buy useless mini koala bears to give to relatives. What do you expect to do with it? Put it as a mantelpiece at the dinner table so every evening, they can awe at the wonders of a fuzzy koala bear of 7 centimetres tall ? Worse, you buy magnets that you never use. It just sticks to the fridge and serves its purpose to visitors to the house who pass by the kitchen sink to strike up a conversation of where you went. Smart, but lame to me. My house never uses magnets, we never stick our shopping list or telephone-numbers-to-call-in-emergency list on our fridge. So, why buy magents when they get confiscated by customs anyway (Magnets are deemed as weapons that compulsates the aircraft's machinery causing the plane to crash over Ayers rock). So why waste money over 15 magnets (costing A$20 at least) that serves as conversation pieces ? If you want to be a show off, hang an Australian flag outside the window. That will give you undivided attention from your neighbours, media and the governement. My mum almost comtemplated to do it until I threatned to jump out of the window along with the flag as my parachute.
My mum is a typical Singaporean tourist. She is a perfect example and I intend to use her in reasonable ways to describe my point of view. I will never insult her or manipulate her in an unruly manner to achieve the meaning of my stories. I respect her but she doesn't respect me some times. Maybe she reads my blog. Then again, she is IT illiterate. I love my mum, however embarraasing a typical Singaporean tourist she behaves.
- Benjamin
What a day, what a day.
If only I wore a hawaiian shirt and brought along a camera & sunglasses, I would have belong to an elite crowd of money spenders. Nope, not the stupid looking Upper-upper class but a tourist.
Travelled the entire of Singapore south to film certain scenes for a video. Wow, it was a leg-breaking, back-numbing, finger-cracking task. Carrying around a light camera and a tripod, that was the easiest task. Overcoming my fears was the worst. Let me lay out the juicy details for ya.
Everyone has fears, including me. Two of them are innate to my horoscope sign of Virgos/Virgoes. I never like to admit that i am wrong and I never want to be in the wrong. Therefore, if I never want to be in the wrong side of things, I don't do the wrong things in life. That's me, I never try to do wrong things. If i don't know how to do certain objectives/task , I'll clarify my objectives/task at hand and go out and do it. This is where my fear comes in. I have a fear for authority and approaching strangers.
Yes. And today, I faced my fears. Lugging a video camera around, you had to take certain shots and for those shots to be steady, you had to be SO conspicuous that people will be looking at you and say "Wah, got people filming leh, go see." And then, a crowd ensues. Crowd control officers arrive and tries to control the 3,000 people encircling the camera crew of 3 but to no avail, the second landing floor collapses, leading to the collapse of Raffles City, like 911. Since Raffles city was one of the tallest hotel in the world, it collapses over Suntec City and the other 4 towers collapses over to Marina Meritus Mandarin and Conrad Hotel. In the end, the only building not destroyed in City Hall is the hideous durains that even falling towers want to avoid its spikes. Of course, that didn't happen. But, passer-bys take a glance and look forward, thinking what "extras" we are and what the hell are we doing here.
Qian Ling, Suhanah and I was part of that filming crew that the public swore, avoided and spitted at. Having a video camera as a tourist is perfectly normal. Having a video camera as a student is like the SARS outbreak. Once the red light is out on the DV cam that you're recording, people turn left like Gigi, turn right like Takeshi to avoid being captured in the camera. For those people out there, give us students a break. You have an occupation going shopping in the day and spitting at strangers, can you spare some thoughts to students who just need a barely 5 second shot of you. Nobody is going to recognise you or that hideous mole on you double chin. Grrrrr.
Digressing again. Back to my fears. As I was saying, I was filming around City Hall area and we need some shots of store fronts. Usually, we need to get authorization from the management for a 5 second shot of their outlook. Usually it takes 5 months to go through their line of management before it is processed, just for a measely 5 second shot because it seems in the 5 seconds, the world will crumble if we STUDENTS took a BAD shot of the shop front. APPARENTLY, they did not know that practice takes perfect and if EVERYONE took bad shots of everything, then why is there the invention of TELEVISION. Well, we approached, we asked nicely, we were on our knees, we slipped a bribe in that handshake. But the answer was simply NO, 5 seconds would cause the investors of the shop to withdraw their stocks from it. This happened at the 37 degree shops along CityLink Mall. I am not saying that the retail assitants were mean, they were simply not flexible.
There were security guards patrolling EVERYWHERE we go. Or worse, hidden cameras that heighten my own fears. So, to avoid dissapointment in everything that we shoot, we adopt a simple approach. Shoot and run. Now, as cowardly as it seem as it may be, This method has been proven effective as they only chase us away when we became an eyesore or that we stopped customers from entering the store (which will affect the investors dividends apparently....). So, the brave Qian Ling (heads up to her), did all the shooting, and we just ran along. She daringly went into MPH, HMV and even to Equinox to film. I was counting down when were they going to release the dogs on us.
Of course we survived the gangly imaginary dog attack, or else i wouldnt be here. I am not brave enough to do such a thing on treading dangerous grounds to film certain shots. My fear of breaching authorization or doing wrong things is simply too overwhelming for me. In the film industry, you need to be thick-skinned. I am just too slim to join the industry then. This fear, which I tried effortlessly today to overcome was almost broken. Until an incident at 3.40 pm took place.
I was filming a moving FEDEX van. It whizzed too fast. I found up ending up 50m away from the rest and next to the Treasury building. I turned around. And took some shots of the Treasury building name in the name for this project. Barely 15 seconds past and a fierce looking Malay policeman came running out, with his hand next to his baton.
Policeman: "Oei, cannot film here. Government building."
Me: (Starts to shiver)"Sorry."
Police: "Where you from?"
Me: (Legs trembling) "Si-Si-Sing-apore Polytechinc"
Police: (Sees Suhanah & Qian Ling coming) "Your crew huh?"
Me: "Yah." (Mouth starts foaming)
Police: "Cannot film here." (Waves the baton in front of my face)
Me: (Convulsions coming, faints)
I didn't faint. I skampered out of there like a rat. This was my first outdoor shooting and the brush of the law was less than welcomed but it made its entry like a Christopher laughter out of nowhere in lecture hall. My fear of approaching strangers or being in the wrong will be part of my personality. Forever. I will never be a surveryor, I will never approach gals in a club, I will never get slammed by a policeman again for a school project. It is a weakness of me. That is why I don't think I will be an insurance agent or a housing agent. If I end up as one, go buy a baton and whack me on my head.
The post of the day: Tourists
Being a tourist and seeing tourist is a totally different concept. Singaporeans loves to travel. Singaporeans also loves to criticise. We Singaporeans have a bad habit. A sight of white skin people and the immediate Singlish of "ang moh" comes out. Sterotypical ? Yes, but it is ironic that we ang moh people in a multi-cultural society.
Singapore makes a great deal of income from Tourism. One thing about Singapore is that we are not even great. A cosmopolitian city we are, but if you want to cosmo, go visit your country's capital. I rather you visit the moon for more interesting spots than in Singapore. We have absolutely nothing. Nothing credible. Zoo - everyone has one. Sentosa - Batam is quite nearby. Esplanade - Geylang or Malaysia also can find. Entertainment - Geylang, Thailand or Malaysia also can find. Shopping - Hong Kong not good enough for you? So much money, give to IMF lah. In summary, Singapore is only good for business, food and manpower. Amazing what the Singaporean Tourism Board has doing to make a useless island to an ideal destination spot to splurge your wealth when we have nothing spectacular to offer you. So, to visitors of Singapore out there, come here for the food. We have a cuisine that will make your bowels move. Remember to visit all the stalls that are rated "D' or even better "E". They are the best here in Singapore. If you want leisure, you can find some holes in some country clubs on a land-scarce island or you can find even lesser holes in Geylang on a baby-scarce island.
Now, how about Singaporeans as tourists? Wow,, we are one of a kind. The moment some stuff is cheap, you scream like the kopitiam auntie to your relatives:" OEI, Singapore sell $2, here only sell $0.20. MUST BUY." This usually can be heard in Johor Bahru. Your parents or relatives are such typical tourists. Do you have a lifetime supply of JB keropok or kaya in your kitchen cabinets?
Another personality trait that Singaporeans exude overseas is also similar to the one mentioned above. The moment something is expensive, you scream like the kopitiam auntie to your relatives: "OEI, don't buy hor, Singapore sell $2, here see $2.01. SO expensive. Go home then buy." This usually can be heard in the United States, Japan, Europe and Australiasia. Singaporeans are frugal shoppers. Cheap is good. Good means everyone must buy. Everyone must buy means must buy more than everyone before everyone buys it. I fully empathises with your pain with the loaded cabinets of keropoks that you have.
There are more interesting habits but will touch on it later. Singaporeans are show-offs so no matter where they go, they must bring evidence of their triumphant overseas. The most common type would be photos. This is proven when my family when overseas, my mother kept pestering me to develop them. I did not heed her instructions for 3 days. It was hell at home until I relented. Even then, she made me went back to the shop again to redevelop them. My mom would bring photos to everyone to show when she went. The flight was leaving from Brisbane in 4 hrs, she asked my Dad to take 18 photos of her in the Hotel. Ummm .... it shows u with a pot of flowers overseas. If she loved that, I shall book a hotel in any Singaporean 4-star hotel and make sure they have a reception area filled with loads of flowers. This behaviour is pretty lame.
Besides photos, there are magnets, mugs, teddy bears, key chains. In other words, souvneirs. In my words, show-off-viers (showoffviers). You buy useless mini koala bears to give to relatives. What do you expect to do with it? Put it as a mantelpiece at the dinner table so every evening, they can awe at the wonders of a fuzzy koala bear of 7 centimetres tall ? Worse, you buy magnets that you never use. It just sticks to the fridge and serves its purpose to visitors to the house who pass by the kitchen sink to strike up a conversation of where you went. Smart, but lame to me. My house never uses magnets, we never stick our shopping list or telephone-numbers-to-call-in-emergency list on our fridge. So, why buy magents when they get confiscated by customs anyway (Magnets are deemed as weapons that compulsates the aircraft's machinery causing the plane to crash over Ayers rock). So why waste money over 15 magnets (costing A$20 at least) that serves as conversation pieces ? If you want to be a show off, hang an Australian flag outside the window. That will give you undivided attention from your neighbours, media and the governement. My mum almost comtemplated to do it until I threatned to jump out of the window along with the flag as my parachute.
My mum is a typical Singaporean tourist. She is a perfect example and I intend to use her in reasonable ways to describe my point of view. I will never insult her or manipulate her in an unruly manner to achieve the meaning of my stories. I respect her but she doesn't respect me some times. Maybe she reads my blog. Then again, she is IT illiterate. I love my mum, however embarraasing a typical Singaporean tourist she behaves.
- Benjamin
Tuesday, November 04, 2003
Middle-class
Had a busy day today. Meetings in the early morning and the late evening. Nevertheless, i picked up a good book titled "The Men From The Boys", written by Philips Collins. I left the BizIT library today with this book in hand, after 5 hrsand 358 pages, I have read it from cover to cover. The story was mesmerizing. The plot so-so.
The plot was about the lives of two young boys, who lead similar lives until their paths diverted differently. It is a journey of friendship, life and family. There were some touching moments of love, there were some parts which I zoomed past because it was utterly boring (I speed read parts when i deem a certain section a waste of my time). I would rate this book 6.5 out of 10 if I was at eBay. Sigh, some parts of my mind are still stuck in the English Bury culture from the book.
During one of the meetings today, Mr Ang fully announce the pleasure that we have a fun-filled packed 3 weeks leading to the final presentation on November 26. Now, let me explain my group's disposition here right from the start.
I am grouped with two other classmates, namely Aaron and Felicia. Initially in July, there was a lot of hoo-hah on grouping due to class politics. Nobody wanted to work with slackers and Aaron and Felicia had a reputation then as half-slackers. Half-slackers are people who will do work when the topic please them or when they like it and their abscene is often explained by falling ill or being indisposed to another commitment. Thankfully, they grew out of the phase.
At July, I was half pondering remaining comfortably with a more "hard-working" group of gals that I have worked with the last semester. Although I didn't get very good project grades with them, they were reliable and ever present for contribution to project work, although there is much to be disputed about. At that point of time, I was overseas having a family vacation during school term. So, both parties called me to persuade who I would like to eventually join up this term. There would be dire consequences if i join one. Least to say, I made a risky decision in my own opinion.
Anyway, i ended up with my two project mates. As a team of 3, I have always been the very troubled one. Reason being, we have a shortage of manpower as compared to teams of 5 and 6. We cope well, and we got into the final 3 of the community project, which in my own opinion, still in total shock. There were two other teams whom i felt had put in more effort. Amanda's group from '04' and Tiffany from'02'. I guess we were lucky to take the last spot from them.
So, we are in the finals now, with 3 weeks to go. To explain my group disposition, we are in a total disadvantage. Firstly, shortage of manpower. Secondly, the other two groups, Pei Wen from '04' and Sharon from '05' had better marks for their presentation AND their report. Thirdly, all 3 of us are busy with commitments. Aaron has ITP, I have a video club assignment and Felicia intends to take on an immediate holiday job. Thankfully, both of them withdrew from a Japan trip that would have taken up 2 weeks of their time. Lastly, the two other groups presenting the NLB project has the BEST presenters in the DMC cohort.
Am i worried or stressed ? Definently. Felicia says i am blowing things out of proportion. I just put things into persepective. My view on this is that since we're in the finals, let's make it a blast and aim high. Therefore, I like to be stressed. We are the underdogs and if we ever do make into 1st or 2nd place, I would be glad to strip to my birthday suit and run around Orchard road although I don't think tourists would appreciate a moving Asian Raffles in the buff.
Sigh, these few days, my stress level will be boiling and as sick as I am, like what McDonalds says, "I'm lovin' it."
Moral of today's post: Social Class
Are you rich or are you poor? Most Singaporeans lie within the range of middle class. But then again as my marketing lecturer says, there is still the Upper middle class, Middle middle class and the Lower middle class. I would say that our social class is determined by our education, occupation, car and the amount of 4-D tickets that you buy.
Let me give you some insights to our middle class. I'm giving an interesting anthropology lesson. Listen up.
The Upper middle class consist of aspiring lawyers, brokers, doctors and the durian men. They live in Condominiums or some even in terrace houses. However, the more expensive the dwelling, the cheaper is their car. So, if they live in some uullu uullu condo in Changi Green, they would mostly likely own a BMW Series 6 as compared to those that live in some urban condos in town, then they own a Mercedes Benz. Either it is the old ah peh type one which your uncle still drives or a Mercedes Benz lorry or van, your friendly neighbourhood durian seller. With the exception of the one mentioned above, the rest don't waste their efforts lining up at 4-D queues. Instead, they ask the maid to go. Or, they invest heavily in shares and bonds in the stock market. Then again, they sometimes ask the maid to call their broker to choose alphabets of the company which she like to gamble her employers money with. If the stock fails to make money, it will be deducted from the maid's maegre salary. Now you know the reason why maids run away or jump down from these high-level condos. Its not the windows they were cleaning, its because the stock market had a bear run.
The Middle middle class are the humble people. No matter how rich they are, from peddling drugs or begging along the Orchard tunnels, they always say they are very poor. That is why 75% of the population lies within this region. One scenario goes like this:
Friend: "Wah, got new handphone siah, rich leh you."
Middle-middle class person: "No lah, this handphone got from my mother one lah."
Friend:" Sure anot, this new model handphone Nokia 9999 just came out yesterday lor."
MMCP: "Aiya, i buy only very cheap lah. Same as the model no."
Friend:" Wah you so rich, your father own governement huh."
MMCP: "Aiya my father is Chiam See Tong lah, he want to own also cannot. AI SAY !!! Wah got new Rolex watch siah, rich leh you."
The cycle repeats itself. Because of the majority of population of MMCP, your circle of friends also fall under the same cateory. There is ONE main reason why the MMCP is so humble. The reason is that if they act too rich, they will be the victims of footing the bill for everyone if they happen to be in a karoke lounge or at a posh restaurant. They always make the rich one pay first and they say they will go dutch later. Usually, it doesnt end up that way and the rich MMCP would end up making a loss making him a poor MMCP after 20 visits to Crystal Jade. Humility is a virtue because wealth is at stake. That's why, you see the MMCP end up purchasing cars that are safe and have long life warranty. This is to safeguard their wealth. MMCP are "kiam siap" or in other words stingy. Come to think of it, all Singaporeans are stingy and if our forefathers weren't kiam siap, we wouldn't be in this world today.
Lastly, the lower middle class. This category is simply summarised as "not rich but act rich". These are people who stay at HDB flats. Their salary do not amount to anything much more than what a McDonalds Floor Manager earns but they still like to splurge. They dont own cars but they buy model cars like Ferrari and Jaguar, to tell people they owned one, that is at a scale of 1:360 that is. They have no maids so everytime they queue up, they always wear sunglasses, straw hats or carry big plastic bags to avoid being seen from fellow relatives or friends, who are practically doing the same thing as them. Marketers like to target them because they are the money spenders. They are the PEOPLE that chalk up those Credit Card bills and register themselves to Visa Mini, Women's Card, Manhattan Card, Black card .... to name a few. These people are mainly suckers for bankruptcy and once in a while, visit the court to get a cheap thrill at barristers in their funny wigs to settle their finance publicly. Point to note, if they keep making mini credit cards, how can these LMC people use them to cover their faces when they cannot wear sunglasses, straw hats or bring big plastic bags of Slim 10 pills to cover their faces to court?
Hope to receive comments or critiques to my blog. I don't know who the hell reads it, because my only promotion of it is through word of mouth or through my friendster account. If you're one of my friend and you happen to read it, email me to send it your honest criticisms or encouragement at quikquiksilver@yahoo.com , thanks.
- Benjamin
Had a busy day today. Meetings in the early morning and the late evening. Nevertheless, i picked up a good book titled "The Men From The Boys", written by Philips Collins. I left the BizIT library today with this book in hand, after 5 hrsand 358 pages, I have read it from cover to cover. The story was mesmerizing. The plot so-so.
The plot was about the lives of two young boys, who lead similar lives until their paths diverted differently. It is a journey of friendship, life and family. There were some touching moments of love, there were some parts which I zoomed past because it was utterly boring (I speed read parts when i deem a certain section a waste of my time). I would rate this book 6.5 out of 10 if I was at eBay. Sigh, some parts of my mind are still stuck in the English Bury culture from the book.
During one of the meetings today, Mr Ang fully announce the pleasure that we have a fun-filled packed 3 weeks leading to the final presentation on November 26. Now, let me explain my group's disposition here right from the start.
I am grouped with two other classmates, namely Aaron and Felicia. Initially in July, there was a lot of hoo-hah on grouping due to class politics. Nobody wanted to work with slackers and Aaron and Felicia had a reputation then as half-slackers. Half-slackers are people who will do work when the topic please them or when they like it and their abscene is often explained by falling ill or being indisposed to another commitment. Thankfully, they grew out of the phase.
At July, I was half pondering remaining comfortably with a more "hard-working" group of gals that I have worked with the last semester. Although I didn't get very good project grades with them, they were reliable and ever present for contribution to project work, although there is much to be disputed about. At that point of time, I was overseas having a family vacation during school term. So, both parties called me to persuade who I would like to eventually join up this term. There would be dire consequences if i join one. Least to say, I made a risky decision in my own opinion.
Anyway, i ended up with my two project mates. As a team of 3, I have always been the very troubled one. Reason being, we have a shortage of manpower as compared to teams of 5 and 6. We cope well, and we got into the final 3 of the community project, which in my own opinion, still in total shock. There were two other teams whom i felt had put in more effort. Amanda's group from '04' and Tiffany from'02'. I guess we were lucky to take the last spot from them.
So, we are in the finals now, with 3 weeks to go. To explain my group disposition, we are in a total disadvantage. Firstly, shortage of manpower. Secondly, the other two groups, Pei Wen from '04' and Sharon from '05' had better marks for their presentation AND their report. Thirdly, all 3 of us are busy with commitments. Aaron has ITP, I have a video club assignment and Felicia intends to take on an immediate holiday job. Thankfully, both of them withdrew from a Japan trip that would have taken up 2 weeks of their time. Lastly, the two other groups presenting the NLB project has the BEST presenters in the DMC cohort.
Am i worried or stressed ? Definently. Felicia says i am blowing things out of proportion. I just put things into persepective. My view on this is that since we're in the finals, let's make it a blast and aim high. Therefore, I like to be stressed. We are the underdogs and if we ever do make into 1st or 2nd place, I would be glad to strip to my birthday suit and run around Orchard road although I don't think tourists would appreciate a moving Asian Raffles in the buff.
Sigh, these few days, my stress level will be boiling and as sick as I am, like what McDonalds says, "I'm lovin' it."
Moral of today's post: Social Class
Are you rich or are you poor? Most Singaporeans lie within the range of middle class. But then again as my marketing lecturer says, there is still the Upper middle class, Middle middle class and the Lower middle class. I would say that our social class is determined by our education, occupation, car and the amount of 4-D tickets that you buy.
Let me give you some insights to our middle class. I'm giving an interesting anthropology lesson. Listen up.
The Upper middle class consist of aspiring lawyers, brokers, doctors and the durian men. They live in Condominiums or some even in terrace houses. However, the more expensive the dwelling, the cheaper is their car. So, if they live in some uullu uullu condo in Changi Green, they would mostly likely own a BMW Series 6 as compared to those that live in some urban condos in town, then they own a Mercedes Benz. Either it is the old ah peh type one which your uncle still drives or a Mercedes Benz lorry or van, your friendly neighbourhood durian seller. With the exception of the one mentioned above, the rest don't waste their efforts lining up at 4-D queues. Instead, they ask the maid to go. Or, they invest heavily in shares and bonds in the stock market. Then again, they sometimes ask the maid to call their broker to choose alphabets of the company which she like to gamble her employers money with. If the stock fails to make money, it will be deducted from the maid's maegre salary. Now you know the reason why maids run away or jump down from these high-level condos. Its not the windows they were cleaning, its because the stock market had a bear run.
The Middle middle class are the humble people. No matter how rich they are, from peddling drugs or begging along the Orchard tunnels, they always say they are very poor. That is why 75% of the population lies within this region. One scenario goes like this:
Friend: "Wah, got new handphone siah, rich leh you."
Middle-middle class person: "No lah, this handphone got from my mother one lah."
Friend:" Sure anot, this new model handphone Nokia 9999 just came out yesterday lor."
MMCP: "Aiya, i buy only very cheap lah. Same as the model no."
Friend:" Wah you so rich, your father own governement huh."
MMCP: "Aiya my father is Chiam See Tong lah, he want to own also cannot. AI SAY !!! Wah got new Rolex watch siah, rich leh you."
The cycle repeats itself. Because of the majority of population of MMCP, your circle of friends also fall under the same cateory. There is ONE main reason why the MMCP is so humble. The reason is that if they act too rich, they will be the victims of footing the bill for everyone if they happen to be in a karoke lounge or at a posh restaurant. They always make the rich one pay first and they say they will go dutch later. Usually, it doesnt end up that way and the rich MMCP would end up making a loss making him a poor MMCP after 20 visits to Crystal Jade. Humility is a virtue because wealth is at stake. That's why, you see the MMCP end up purchasing cars that are safe and have long life warranty. This is to safeguard their wealth. MMCP are "kiam siap" or in other words stingy. Come to think of it, all Singaporeans are stingy and if our forefathers weren't kiam siap, we wouldn't be in this world today.
Lastly, the lower middle class. This category is simply summarised as "not rich but act rich". These are people who stay at HDB flats. Their salary do not amount to anything much more than what a McDonalds Floor Manager earns but they still like to splurge. They dont own cars but they buy model cars like Ferrari and Jaguar, to tell people they owned one, that is at a scale of 1:360 that is. They have no maids so everytime they queue up, they always wear sunglasses, straw hats or carry big plastic bags to avoid being seen from fellow relatives or friends, who are practically doing the same thing as them. Marketers like to target them because they are the money spenders. They are the PEOPLE that chalk up those Credit Card bills and register themselves to Visa Mini, Women's Card, Manhattan Card, Black card .... to name a few. These people are mainly suckers for bankruptcy and once in a while, visit the court to get a cheap thrill at barristers in their funny wigs to settle their finance publicly. Point to note, if they keep making mini credit cards, how can these LMC people use them to cover their faces when they cannot wear sunglasses, straw hats or bring big plastic bags of Slim 10 pills to cover their faces to court?
Hope to receive comments or critiques to my blog. I don't know who the hell reads it, because my only promotion of it is through word of mouth or through my friendster account. If you're one of my friend and you happen to read it, email me to send it your honest criticisms or encouragement at quikquiksilver@yahoo.com , thanks.
- Benjamin
Sunday, November 02, 2003
Free
Wow didn't blog yesterday. Not that I was complacent, but it was a good off-day for me.
Tommorrow is a beginning of a new semester. You must be thinking, isn't ben on a 2 months break now? The answer is no. I'm a workaholic and no work equals suffocation of limp arms, limbs and brain cells. Hence, my work day consist more of designing some brochures out of interest and planning the schedule and type of shots for a school video. As taxing as it might be, i'm in a more relaxed atmosphere now that there is less school project pressure. Only 4 priorities for these 2 months, seems easy enough.
Lets go straight on to the moral of my story: Free
Nothing in this world is free. You have heard this statement on various occassions. Mostly when you were young, when your mother pulled your ear till it was scarlet red and dragging you away from the toys department. Kids have a very uncivilised view of money. It is so narrow that they think that the world is their own, everything and anything belongs to them. As they grew up from their innocent lifestyle, they learn the value of printed paper and metal round chips that could be traded in for worthwhile value like ice-cream, diabetic sweets and barbie dolls. Slowly, they start saving these printed paper and chips and declare themselves millionaires in their deluded minds. I was one of those kids. But we all grew to be materialistic.
Your mother doesn't print paper and it certainly does not grow on trees. It is however, earned in 2 ways. Through blood, sweat and determination(mostly from blood) or through undeceitful ways, either way, money ends up in your hands, which eventually flows through your fingers and you start off once again when you were. Penniless. It is a vicious cycle i tell you.
If the world is free, we wouldn't need to work so hard, slog like slaves to get our miserable remuneration. Think about this. In Singapore, an average dewelling that is a 5-room flat would costs $450,000. And, a car, would cost $90,000. That is $550,000 just for a basic transportation and shelter. Of course you can tell me you can live in cardboard boxes and use your two pair of legs for travel. Then, i'll tell you that you just shorten your lifespan as the amount of sickness and weary travel you placed on your knees will send you to you grave sooner than the next edition of Harry Potter comes about. Not to digress, is it ever possible to earn that obscene amount of money for 40 years ? (assuming that we don't fall sick, air is used as petrol, our COE has no expiry date, the house furnishings can withstand 40 years, our children can survive all by themselves the moment they come out from the womb .... yadda yadda). If we include cost of healthcare expenses, children upbringing, expenditure on house and cars and food, it would amount to a grand total of $1 million dollars. That amount also does not include PUB bills, Handphone bills & most important of all, extra expenses of goods that we don't need. For example, a OSIM toenail massager, a Burberry handkerchief and children that spit, scream and hiss at you. We need branded goods to keep up our self-image and we need children to justify our prescene in life to see them suffer the same fate as you did.
Therefore, the grand total is S$2 million. Now, by time you get married, you would most probably be 30 years old. Retiring at 60, that leaves you 30 years with your spouse to earn that amount for your upkeep. If you do your maths right, 667,000 a year must be earned as a couple. That means you as an individual have to earn $333,500 anually or $27,700 a month. Now, can you find an employer that will hire you for $27,700 a month ? Unless, you are the Sultan of Brunei, druglord or a kway teow hawker, that amount is simply out of reach.
Therefore, we collect debts. And we pass it onto our children. Another justification for their prescene. Back to my point, won't it be easier if the world was free ? We would have less worries, less wrinkles and less whining. But then again, if everything is free and nobody works, nobody will be at the water filtration plant, nobody will be cleaning the feathers from the chicken and nobody is using the broom to sweep the streets. Then, Singaporeans will be dead becaise of the lack of Chicken rice, abundance of untreated NEWater and dirty streets. Therefore, there will be more worries, more wrinkles and more whining, and people will start going back to work to bring back Singapore into the peaceful state it once was.
Free. A notion that would create chaos. Imagine Japanese women yelling in the Louis Vuitton store for handbags and panties , Americans yelling for hot dogs, Starbucks coffee and burgers and Singaporeans yelling for lucky LuoHan fishes, winning 4-D tickets and laptops. Can you imagine a world where everything is free ? I'm too afraid to go there.
So, next time before you want to cheat the bus driver by not beeping your EZLink card, think again. Because if everyone did that, there would be no jobs for bus drivers and you will end up walking from your house to Dover station just to attend lessons. Nothing is free in life. Except for lousy advertisements.
- Benjamin
Wow didn't blog yesterday. Not that I was complacent, but it was a good off-day for me.
Tommorrow is a beginning of a new semester. You must be thinking, isn't ben on a 2 months break now? The answer is no. I'm a workaholic and no work equals suffocation of limp arms, limbs and brain cells. Hence, my work day consist more of designing some brochures out of interest and planning the schedule and type of shots for a school video. As taxing as it might be, i'm in a more relaxed atmosphere now that there is less school project pressure. Only 4 priorities for these 2 months, seems easy enough.
Lets go straight on to the moral of my story: Free
Nothing in this world is free. You have heard this statement on various occassions. Mostly when you were young, when your mother pulled your ear till it was scarlet red and dragging you away from the toys department. Kids have a very uncivilised view of money. It is so narrow that they think that the world is their own, everything and anything belongs to them. As they grew up from their innocent lifestyle, they learn the value of printed paper and metal round chips that could be traded in for worthwhile value like ice-cream, diabetic sweets and barbie dolls. Slowly, they start saving these printed paper and chips and declare themselves millionaires in their deluded minds. I was one of those kids. But we all grew to be materialistic.
Your mother doesn't print paper and it certainly does not grow on trees. It is however, earned in 2 ways. Through blood, sweat and determination(mostly from blood) or through undeceitful ways, either way, money ends up in your hands, which eventually flows through your fingers and you start off once again when you were. Penniless. It is a vicious cycle i tell you.
If the world is free, we wouldn't need to work so hard, slog like slaves to get our miserable remuneration. Think about this. In Singapore, an average dewelling that is a 5-room flat would costs $450,000. And, a car, would cost $90,000. That is $550,000 just for a basic transportation and shelter. Of course you can tell me you can live in cardboard boxes and use your two pair of legs for travel. Then, i'll tell you that you just shorten your lifespan as the amount of sickness and weary travel you placed on your knees will send you to you grave sooner than the next edition of Harry Potter comes about. Not to digress, is it ever possible to earn that obscene amount of money for 40 years ? (assuming that we don't fall sick, air is used as petrol, our COE has no expiry date, the house furnishings can withstand 40 years, our children can survive all by themselves the moment they come out from the womb .... yadda yadda). If we include cost of healthcare expenses, children upbringing, expenditure on house and cars and food, it would amount to a grand total of $1 million dollars. That amount also does not include PUB bills, Handphone bills & most important of all, extra expenses of goods that we don't need. For example, a OSIM toenail massager, a Burberry handkerchief and children that spit, scream and hiss at you. We need branded goods to keep up our self-image and we need children to justify our prescene in life to see them suffer the same fate as you did.
Therefore, the grand total is S$2 million. Now, by time you get married, you would most probably be 30 years old. Retiring at 60, that leaves you 30 years with your spouse to earn that amount for your upkeep. If you do your maths right, 667,000 a year must be earned as a couple. That means you as an individual have to earn $333,500 anually or $27,700 a month. Now, can you find an employer that will hire you for $27,700 a month ? Unless, you are the Sultan of Brunei, druglord or a kway teow hawker, that amount is simply out of reach.
Therefore, we collect debts. And we pass it onto our children. Another justification for their prescene. Back to my point, won't it be easier if the world was free ? We would have less worries, less wrinkles and less whining. But then again, if everything is free and nobody works, nobody will be at the water filtration plant, nobody will be cleaning the feathers from the chicken and nobody is using the broom to sweep the streets. Then, Singaporeans will be dead becaise of the lack of Chicken rice, abundance of untreated NEWater and dirty streets. Therefore, there will be more worries, more wrinkles and more whining, and people will start going back to work to bring back Singapore into the peaceful state it once was.
Free. A notion that would create chaos. Imagine Japanese women yelling in the Louis Vuitton store for handbags and panties , Americans yelling for hot dogs, Starbucks coffee and burgers and Singaporeans yelling for lucky LuoHan fishes, winning 4-D tickets and laptops. Can you imagine a world where everything is free ? I'm too afraid to go there.
So, next time before you want to cheat the bus driver by not beeping your EZLink card, think again. Because if everyone did that, there would be no jobs for bus drivers and you will end up walking from your house to Dover station just to attend lessons. Nothing is free in life. Except for lousy advertisements.
- Benjamin
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
