Saturday, November 20, 2004

10 More Days to P O P

For the army deluded females, P O P means passing out parade.

That's where I can officially leave the island for good. (I hope...)

On depressing news, I reached home today to receive my rejection letter from the Air Force.

Whoopie ! Now I need not die on an airfield in the upcoming future.

That would leave me solely on the track on making my moolah on the business world I guess = -)

In order to save my miserable pay and pocket allowance has officially been declared "you're on your own", staying indoors seems like the best thing.

I wanna watch "The Incredibles". Heard only good reviews like GOD DAMN EVERYWHERE.

Anybody ?

Benji

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Army Daze

It's a 5 day holiday for me as my burnt weekends due to field camp are given to me off in lieu so I book in on Monday !

BOO YAH !

So for the last 2 days, I've been crashing at my army pals' place playing our consoles (read xbox n PS2) and heading to town to view in the early X'mas lights.

I should also deem myself as a "movie fan" right now. I patronize cinemas like a burrowing mole eager to return home.

There are so many great shows that I'm eager to watch. The only genre I avoid is super horror shows that scare even my shit shitless.

So what if I'm a big pussy : P Becoz for days after that, my vivid imagination will work it's magic based on the horror movie plot, and restless nights follows.

Placing that fact aside, I watched 'Taxi' becoz of the Queen.

You can take a ride on me if you want


And Latifah didn't dissappoint me. As the heroine, I the audience laughed at her antics and her driving prowess.

Gwen recommended I should go watch the French versions (read 1, 2 & 3) that I'm sorely missing out on.

In a matter of hours, I'll also be eagerly catching up on "The Forgotten". I've been anticipating this for MONTHS. 2 to be exact since I caught it's trailer.

The plot intringues me. And I lust after Julianne Moore, just not in a "bring to bed" way, more like "ooh you have a brain and a luscious body" kind of way.

Put your hands where I want them to be

Okay, up to this point, you must be thinking what brainwashing food the army has been feeding to Benny.

Benny is lusting after women twice his age, possibly twice his size and has express notions twice to jump into bed with them.

Just so you know, I'm perfectly O-KAY. And I feel like an eager F4 fan now if they would appear in a press conference and sign in between my butt cheeks with a permanant ink marker.

BOO YAH !

After viewing the interesting side of the split personality pyscho Benny, the Older Woman Slayer, now comes to the boring part.

Benji, the Underpaid Recruit from the depths of the Tekong jungles.

It's only another fortnight before I get posted out. Frankly, my hopes of being a pilot are dashed because I don't think my peers and my lao das perceived me as someone with calibre enough to be an officer.

Thus, I shall officially end my journey (dream) as a pilot here on out. (BTW, just so you know, you need to be an officer to be a pilot.)

Well as depressive as I sound, I'm not dying to be a pilot. If you say the chinese phrase "cannot eat the grapes, then say it's sour", I'll smack you with a crate of wine bottles.

But I'm sure there are mundane stuff that I'll be assigned to. Coupled with the fact that my fitness is ALMOST there except for arm power. SIGH ....

But looking back at the 14 weeks which I have enjoyed (overlooking the fact of my buddy which I have come to abhor), it has truly been an amazing experience (quote sans Amazing race eliminatees).

The bonds, the humour, the poking, the encouragement, the sharing of rations, the screaming and frustration, the rushing and the tekan-ing.

(Wipe away a shed of tear)

It has truly been too quick to absorb what I went through. In a blink of an eye or the view of my last 5 entries or so, my days in BMTC will soon dissolve and days in a unit (aka Hell) will come forth.

It has truly been an army daze for moi.





Peace out,
Schizo Ben/Benji/Benny

P.S. If you can't recognize me, that's because I'm wearing my geeky army specs and lost 7.4 kg = P

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Pilot results update

FYI, the application of me ever being a pilot is still being processed.

I went for the computerized test, quite confident I did pretty quick and well.

I went for the medical, gotta have a review a fortnight later, pending my hearing and dental.

So if you are a person who want to condemn me to ever fly an aeroplane much less a kite, just scream harshly into my ear, and I'll be permantly have hearing problems thus failing to listen to minute sounds.

My own self perception of the chances of being a pilot: 20%

The real possibility of me ever being a pilot: 0.1%

The possibility of me signing on if I advance through all the check-ups and interviews: 99.9%

I don't wish to put all my fruits in a basket.

I'm not DYING to be a pilot. The notion of having an opportunity to fly the skies no matter in a heli, f-16 or a transport plane is pretty chirpy for moi.

The alternative route is to stamp my trademark in the advertising industry.

Not that I will make much of a ripple anyway but climbing the corporate ladder will be an ardous task for the early few years.

Scraping dirt and paperwork with pathethic compensation, being a pilot sounds like an easier route with less shit to shovel.

Then again, there is always politics be it between flight engineers & pilots or account executives & directors.

There's always shit in the world when clumps of group of people are together.

On an interesting note, I think I mention somewhere early in my blog that I'm interested in anthropology.

I like to study people behaviours, what they think and do, how they backstab and use one another. The evil side of human beings.

Exploring it is a kind of inner calling for me, I don't know why. Maybe that is why I love to immerse myself in reality shows for the certain "extent" of reality they can provide.

Whether I become a pilot, pyschologist or an advertising asshole, I guess the only reality one can immerse themselves to truly fully experience the evil side of human beings is their jobs.

Being used, stepped upon and abused. Part and parcel of the working world as much as the media or our textbooks which to cover up and deny.

I just wanna get out of the army and face the shit. Because all the reward is the salary which can provide you sustainance and survival.

That's why we are here for.

Survival of the fittest.

Step up or be stepped upon.

That is why I'm aiming for a commanding school to be either a Sergeant or an officer. I hope to be either one because the only thing that I'm lacking is my arm strength to do chin ups.

I definently do not want to be a lackey for the rest of my life.

I want to be in control.

Freak,
Benji

Friday, November 05, 2004

Grenade !

I'm back on a Friday night from that dreaded island.

That's because of an "Espirit De Corps" run at Marina South on a god-damn Saturday morning.

If there is a God, how could GOD let that happen?

It is a SATURDAY morning.

People DO sleep on saturday mornings you know?

Yes, PEOPLE, the little walking two-legged rag dolls you created to walk on earth.

Remember? But then again, I'm an atheist.

And I need my god-damn sleep for the run tommorrow so this blog entry will be tart and short.

(((Note: For the high-praising Christian fellowers, the above paragraphs were only symbols of expressions, I'm not Anti-Christ for God Sake)))

Religious bull aside, I threw a LIVE grenade today !!!

It might seem like a Chey! So what but I guess every NS man shudders and smile at their own self recollection of the day they threw their grenade.

It's like having sex after being a virgin for 50 years and never knew how orgasmic release can be.

I apologize for the sexual reference but then again, the experience was so fast that you never knew it happened until minutes after you release.

I ran to the bay, waited for other 3 botaks to throw their explosive yakult bottles and when it was my turn to throw mine, I didn't hesitate.

Until the moment I took out my safety lever and then I started to say.

Ut Oh.

When I was given the signal to release hell to the targets, I just threw blindly and scream and scramble for my full-bladder balls.

Disappointingly, I didn't pee on my pants as expected. However, BOOM! it went and the vibrations were just stunning and shocking.

A minute later and I ran back to the safety shed for cover. In barely 5 minutes, I did something worth to be called a MAN !!! It was so fast like 30 blinks of an eyelid !

Wahahaha , I wouldn't mind throwing grenades for a living but I would be pyschotic to sign on my life/future to the green uniform.

Ut Ah.

On Bitchy Ben news about his Beloved Bastardly Buddy, these are quotes that came straight from the source:

"My cough is getting worse." (Pause) "It's because it rain this morning."

"I feel pain but I don't know where it is."

"Wake me up tommorrow morning please. I accidentally drank half a bottle of cough syrup."

Note: My buddy is more stupid than a hermit crab. He didn't even bathe for 2 days because he didn't want to get cold. Imagine the suffering I had to bear with his smell and his hygiene.

Okay, it's almost midnight, I gotte knock out or else I'll be a walking zombie running straight to the ocean.

That would be a treat for journalists. = )

- Benji

P.S. Will provide updates of wannabe-pilot results tmr